Prosecuting Thoughts

Guilt hides behind fear

arriving at odd hours of night,

stealing the peace

that comes from dreamland.

The heart races to find

a working rhythm

trying to dance with

an irrational form of harmony.

Each breath is agonizing

with minutes and hours.

Tic

Toc.

Tic

Toc.

I am not this madness

vacant of rationale,

lacking intuition,

coming and going

without permission,

prosecuting and judging

all of my humanness

diving into the insanity

of unreasoning moments.

Tic

Toc.

Tic

Toc.

I am more,

no less than tomorrow,

but a sum of yesterday,

living righteously and tolerably.

I am no longer that person

who feared the unknown

clenching to her tears

in hopes of not melting away

from finally letting go.

Tic

Toc.

Tic

Toc.

Compassion travels far

during the witching hours

disappearing to an unreachable place

until the light of a new day

and I find serenity

in the outside world.

I witness God staring into my window

through the sunlight

casting over the mountains

and I smile

because I am not alone.

Even through

doubts,

remorse,

and regretful memories

I know for certain

that I’ve never been alone.

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7 thoughts on “Prosecuting Thoughts

  1. This was phenomenal! Your words speak to the heart and soul of so many people’s experience. Thank you for being so brave and so willing. Peace…

    1. Thank you for stopping by. Funny thing about anxiety and thoughts at night: a lot of people experience the emotions and can relate but never talk about it. I appreciate the feedback. Thanks!

  2. You are right…and I have noticed a few poets here at wordpress write poetry on insomnia and such. You did a great job getting to the heart of this. Love the ‘tic toc’ effect and also the way you ended the piece. 🙂

      1. So kind of you to say Milli – thank you! ~ Also appreciate your visits tonight — off to sleep now hopefully will be a peaceful one – for you too! Much Love ~RL

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