Chivalry: A Lost Art

I have a confession to make. I used to feel ashamed but now I realize I must accept who I am. “I am a hopeless romantic.” There, ah…I said it! And, I don’t mean like watching chick flicks, or reading Nicholas Sparks or Richard Evan novels. I mean, like, I love crying-till-the-snot-rolls-down-my-face-along-with-mascara type of hopelessness. I love movies that touch me in such a deep way with love scenes that make a heart do the Macarena with joy. I love the tango of two people on screen pushing, pulling and then joining together in unbelievable love. Yep, that’s who I am! Now that this is out in the open I can share when this desire to make my heart melt really started.

I think we are all born with an innate amount of genetic characteristics. I believe mine got all bundled into one: the romantic. I cry at movies, at commercials, at reading a greeting card, at a kiss and a hug from a friend, a kind act from a stranger, an animal needing caressing, etc. Oh, I am all up on having my heart melt in more ways than I care to write about. I think it came with me from the moment I was conceived. Perhaps my parents had an extraordinary love for each other, although I never witnessed it. I don’t just romanticize about love affairs. I am a romantic when it comes to my children, friendships, family, and animals. Anything that has a happy ending, a fairy tale setting and the ability to move me into goose bumps is what makes me tick. I should be embarrassed by the gushiness that comes out of me, but since I’ve declared this weakness I will pass on the shame.

I find that chivalry has somewhat disappeared in our society. It has become a lost art. What happened to real love letters written by hand, roses, opening doors, pulling chairs, and wooing for more than 10 minutes? What has happened to truly letting another inside the heart and trusting them fully? What has happened to reading poetry, staying up all night and pouring your heart out (and not by email or text)? What happened to sweet whispers, holding hands, walking in a park and getting to know each other? We are made to love…to deeply explore the profound emotion of unconditional love. Love is all there is, whether it is between a couple or any other relationships.

I have a friend who still waits for her boyfriend to open the car door and pull her chairs out after many years. I have questioned her about this when she has been with me in the car and she waits for me to open the door, forgetting that I am not her boyfriend. She says that those simple things are what make her still believe in love. I believe it too. Chivalry, even old fashion in history, goes a long way. The reason there are romantic novels, sappy love songs, and corny movies is because romance is still a desire in our lives. It isn’t only for women either. I know a few men who eat up those things…in private! Confession is freeing, ya’ll!!!!!!

My eldest son still opens the door for me when I am with him. He still waits for me to sit before he sits. The gentleness of allowing someone else to put you first is remarkable and extremely special. Romance is not overrated. It is superficially underrated. It is sad that we must go watch a romantic movie to let our hearts open up when we should be doing it on a daily basis.

I love little sticky notes. I get them from my kids. Sometime ago one of my sons left me a handwritten note on the refrigerator door:

Dear Mom,

You are a kind and gracious God. Thank you for everything and all things! Peace be with you.

Love you,

(he drew a heart) and signed his name.

I was so touched by it that as I was pouring my coffee the tears began to fill my cup. It’s the silly things that get me. It’s the simple things that go a long way. My kids are always surprising me with love.

I would love to hear what touches your heart. Please send me a note! I can’t promise that I won’t cry to some of them…or all of them. I already confessed, what else can I say?

“The most ordinary things could be made extraordinary.” – Nicholas Sparks The Lucky One

20 thoughts on “Chivalry: A Lost Art

  1. unfetteredbs

    I love when my husband gets my newspaper, makes me coffee, does the laundry and tells me its hot being married to a librarian — haaaaa

  2. I love when being so far away, he still makes me feel he is nearby, close. With a word. A smile. A thing unsaid but felt. Feelings bursting in words that can’ t be left unsaid. Yes, when he makes the most ordinary things extraordinary simply by…being himself.

  3. I have to admit to being the same Millie. I am a hopeless romantic too, the smallest things can open the floodgates. It is because I am a sensitive and caring person, probably exactly as you are.
    Shirley Anne x

    1. I believe it moves us in ways that others cannot understand. I wouldn’t change it. I can’t. It is who I am and who you are! Embrace it. Thank you so much for stopping by and sharing. Much love!

  4. free penny press

    I’m not married any longer but will admit that he was spontaneous and romantic.. Now, my eldest son surprises me with friendly notes (not romantic of course) to remind me how awesome, pretty and appreciated I am.. They are priceless keepsakes!!

  5. I love to do everything that brings a smile on anyone’s face..I get attached emotionally in instants and love to care for them,be they strangers or friends. I like to express myself as I am always overflooded with overwhelming emotions.. For being touched I miss the attention and affection ,for my man is a workoholic and is mostly busy .my younger one is too small and elder one jumped into teens,so it is always me showering love everywhere. And the rest what touches me most… Is every word what you have written MIllie. Exactly what I would like to say!

    1. My dear friend, you are such a giver and a lover. Your words, expressions, and stories always make my heart melt. I love YOU! Continue giving but also allow for the gifts of receiving. Much love to you. Your comment brought tears to my heart. Have a blessed day!

  6. I’m becoming more of a romantic. My heart melts at the silly love notes I find near my computer, the single chocolate kiss that sits on the coffee pot, the ‘I love you’ spelled out in almonds on the counter and the words to the silly made up songs my fiancé sings to the dog and me.

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