I believe we learn from pain. We have been trained to feel the heartache and push through it with anger, depression, or whatever other emotion it conjures up. Every morning I receive quotes to my cell phone. Today’s was by William Faulkner, “Given the choice between the experience of pain and nothing, I would choose pain.” I agree. My failures, aches, and breaks have taught me more than never trying anything at all. Because of such failures and lessons, I have been transformed and re-molded. It has not only been the life I have chosen but God’s will in an incredible story He helps me write so that I continue to aspire for more. And those painful experiences push the boundaries in life. Those amazing lessons have humbled me, forcing me to honor the divine.
Even as young children we learn through pain. If we touch something hot we know to stay away from it in the future. Children register the simplicity in the reaction of circumstances. As adults, we sometimes choose selective amnesia to deal with the same situations (which cause the same painful effect), like that old saying: “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”
In this depth I feel closer than ever to the Divine. Each painful experience has allowed me to accept something frightening about myself. I have rehearsed all my life for this particular moment, like a dancer preparing for the ultimate recital. Every rehearsal has been painful, frustrating, but enlightened while preparing for the final testimony of strength. I have learned to take materialism and abstract emotions and placed them on some shelf high above to observe. I keep those parts of my life in view so I won’t fall again in the same mistakes. Failure can be repeated if it’s not recognized as failure. Experience is the after mass of falling down, getting hurt, and hitting a rocky bottom. As Bill Cosby once said, “I don’t know the key to success but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.”
I have learned from spiritual teachings that we are ultimately responsible for our choices and actions. Our decisions come from knowledge or the lack of knowledge. That’s the law of responsibility that explains the cause and effect. As elementary science teaches us – for every action there is a reaction. Divine reasoning cannot destroy this or change it. There would be absolutely no memory. In order to solve any problem in life we must focus on a solution and recognize the problem without excuses. Through pain we are pushed to step back, acknowledge the lesson, and then decide if we want to repeat.
I would not change a single obstacle, challenge or heartbreak. They have molded me to grow while acknowledging the path. This is a mystical journey. We are always held through love, joy, grace, and compassion. Each lesson has taught me the capacity of my humanness. Each sorrow has opened me to a higher consciousness of acceptance. It is purely serendipitous. As Oprah says, “Turn your wounds into wisdom.”