My mother has been very present in my thoughts since yesterday. My youngest daughter and I went to the movies during the day. At some point she said something about her grandmother. Soon after synchronicity visited and a trail of memories came to stay a while. My mother was in the car next to us at a light, up the mountain looking at the cows, picking flowers on a farm, at the gas station, and in the car with us singing. My mother was there. I smelled her, felt her, and sensed her soul like I haven’t in a long time. There were moments yesterday that took my breath away with her touch.
I was the baby of the family. My sisters are 15 years and 24 years my senior. But, I wasn’t the baby. I was the one who took the risks, the incredible challenges without thinking and proceeded to paint way outside of the lines. I was an easy child and a difficult one simultaneously. I was submissive and passive aggressive. I was, to all accounts, impossible to figure out from one minute to another although I seemed predictable until I wasn’t. My mother did everything to control and break me down into “normal” causing anxiety and fears beyond what any teenager should experience. But, she was an amazing woman of courage and strength and having a child alone at 44 was definitely not an easy task in a Latin country in the late 60’s. There was no “free love” movement over there. There were social statuses and rules and many issues that could have pushed her over the edge. I don’t know how she did it. She did. I am here. And yesterday she was with me.
As I am transitioning into a new journey I am reminded that loved ones guide us constantly…even when they aren’t physically here. I know this…I see it in others all the time. It’s rare that I see the visitors for myself. I would love to get the beautiful messages loved ones give to them through me. I get them in dreams. Yesterday my mother’s presence allowed me to reach over the realm and thank her. I spoke with her last night before sleep. I asked her to show me the path in the most gentle way. It’s been a rough month. It’s been an emotional one full of tugging and pulling and pushing trying to find purpose. It’s just been challenging. But, this morning on a hike my mother guided me with love. I saw her favorite flower that I have not seen in these mountains. I smiled, tears forming in my spirit, and briefly thanked her. I watched the blanket of clouds engulfing the land and I knew she was there witnessing it all.
We all have these moments and the ability to speak with our departed ones. I have no magic trick. I have no special gift. What I do have is the acceptance, awareness, and mindfulness that we are never alone. We are always being guided by Spirit, God, Angels, and Teachers from beyond. I have the willingness to sit in silence and feel the presence of Universal Love extend through the veil of reality. If you are honest with your intuition you know you’ve felt it through a gentle touch when no one was there, or smelled a favorite flower or food, or even heard a whisper. It’s comforting to know we are never far from the comfort of our loved ones. It’s the best feeling of compassion and love there is.
Thanks, Mami, for your gift yesterday and today! It’s been a long time….glad you found me in the mountains. Te adoro muchisimo!