A few days prior to our trip I woke up at 3am dreaming I was in the Amazon jungle…
I was walking through a thick tropical forest. I ended up sitting on a giant boulder and a small woman appeared. She was old but still had thick black hair. She could’ve been young. There was no age to her. She had beautiful black eyes. The lines on her face told their own story. She came close to me, almost gliding through the air. It wasn’t as if she was walking. She told me she was a Curandera (Healer). Immediately I became defensive by telling her that I would not be doing Ayahuasca or any funny plant medicine. I explained that I already have intense visions. She laughed in a sarcastic manner. She knew I would tell her that. I also told her that I would not be returning to my past experiences in order to move forward and, in Spanish, she told me that I didn’t have to. She acknowledged that I have done that healing already. My challenge now was to move forward into the future with the acceptance of my gifts. They have been entrusted by my own soul before getting here in this incarnation. She said I was to help others and, by not utilizing my power, I was avoiding living in my true-authentic purpose. It was my contract. It was my life mission and it started with my family, lovers, and children…but that they were just classroom lessons preparing me for what was to come.
WTF! Even in the dream I felt the sting of some judgment and resistance.
So I asked her how to do that? She said I would find the answers when I got there. So I asked where “there” was. She laughed again and never answered but her eyes told me otherwise. Even though she was small in stature, her spirit was gigantic.
Now, it’s when it gets wickedly interesting. The rain started falling on me…but she wasn’t getting wet. She had a bubble/veil or something. I heard the thunder in the background and I woke. I woke to the rain outside the opened windows of our bedroom. I was completely disoriented touching the bed to find my husband. I woke smelling the forest in the room. The sound was still traveling in waking moments. I got up to use the bathroom and it lingered. She lingered in the hallway and then it all left.
Obviously it was an astral travel and not a dream. But, now…three weeks later I feel her nearby. I felt her in Cusco. I have felt her at night waiting for a decision…one I cannot make at this time. “Cannot” is unacceptable. Let me rephrase that: I won’t make at this moment since there are a few things aligning the path that take priority. Quitting my job isn’t in the cards at this time. I struggle with this everyday. I want to make money utilizing my creativity and passion for sharing stories. I want to write and get paid for it. I met a shaman in Peru the day before we left who said almost word by word what the Curandera said to me.
I truly had no expectations when I went to Peru. I wanted a vacation. I found much more. One specific miracle happened the day I climbed Machu Picchu. I lost my hearing three years ago on this month in my right ear. While hiking I felt a pop and sound exploding in it. Since we’ve returned I can hear about 40%. I am blessed for this. It’s messed up my equilibrium for a bit but I am adjusting and completely grateful. That was just one of the gifts I attained in our trip. There have been others but that’s for another time.
Who knows what will happen to me in the next few weeks, months or years. But I feel the expansion at night when I am quiet. I feel my soul begging to trust it for whatever is coming…which I do. The cosmic energy this month is less intense than the last months. I urge you to sit with it. Let it mother you and love you so you can move through it with positive energy. It’s not harsh. It’s truly sweet. I share this, as I share all my muses, so you don’t feel alone in your journey.
We got this! We are connected. Mucho love to you…..