Category: Essay

Lessons From My Puerto Rican Mother

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Growing up with a Puerto Rican mother, who was a single parent, was a gift that shaped my life in profound ways. Her wisdom, strength, and vibrant cultural heritage imparted invaluable life lessons that continue to guide me. From embracing diversity to cherishing family bonds, here are some of the invaluable teachings I’ve received from my extraordinary Puerto Rican mother.

Embracing Cultural Pride:

One of the most significant lessons my Puerto Rican mother instilled in me is the importance of embracing and celebrating our cultural heritage. From an early age, she taught me about the richness of Puerto Rican traditions, music, cuisine, and language. Through lively family gatherings, she ensured that I understood the significance of cultural pride and the need to honor our roots. By doing so, she cultivated a sense of belonging, instilling in me a deep appreciation for the diversity that exists in the world and reminding me to always be proud of where I come from.

Strength in Resilience:

My Puerto Rican mother’s unwavering strength in the face of adversity has been a constant source of inspiration. She experienced the hardships of life firsthand and taught me that resilience is the key to overcoming any challenge. Through her example, I learned the importance of perseverance, determination, and the ability to bounce back from setbacks. Her resilience taught me that life’s obstacles are merely opportunities for growth and that with determination, I can overcome any obstacle that comes my way. I am raising two small children alone like she was at this age. I understand more than ever, the sacrifices and strength that is running through my blood because of her.

The Power of Family:

Family holds a special place in Puerto Rican culture, and my mother made sure I understood its significance. She taught me that family is not only defined by blood ties but also by the love, support, and unity shared among its members. Through her actions, she demonstrated the importance of fostering strong relationships, prioritizing quality time, and showing unconditional love. As a child I didn’t understand these lessons. Today, her emphasis on family values is well understood and appreciated. She created a strong foundation for me, teaching me to cherish my loved ones and reminding me that they are an endless source of support, comfort, and joy.

The Art of Generosity:

Generosity flows naturally in Puerto Rican culture, and my mother embodied this virtue with many around her. She taught me the joy of giving and the importance of helping others. Whether it was preparing a feast for friends and neighbors, or even creating gifts for the family (she was a talented artist), she showed me that even the smallest acts of kindness can have a profound impact. She has inspired me to be compassionate, empathetic, and always willing to extend a helping hand to those in need. Through her actions, she ingrained in me the belief that kindness and generosity are powerful tools for making a positive difference in the world. My mother was forty-four years old when I came along. She made sure I always knew the importance of being kind and that it would always be repaid tenfold.

My Puerto Rican mother’s teachings have shaped the person I am today, infusing my life with a profound sense of cultural pride, resilience, family values, and generosity. Her wisdom and guidance continue to influence my choices, relationships, and interactions with the world around me, serving as a constant reminder of the remarkable woman she was and the invaluable lessons she has imparted. I may not have appreciated any of this years ago, but today I recognize I am so much like her beautiful qualities.

I hope you take the time to recognize your own culture and how your parents teach and mold you to become the person that you are today. I am blessed to have had Josefina as my beautiful mother. It’s been 15 years since I last heard her voice, although I know she’s always around me.

I love you!

The Sacred Rhythms of the Woodpecker

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Amidst the symphony of nature’s marvels, the woodpecker stands out as a mystical creature, offering us valuable insights and spiritual healing. This enchanting bird carries within it a profound medicine that resonates with the rhythms of the natural world. In this blog post, we embark on a heartfelt exploration of the spiritual medicine of the woodpecker, discovering the wisdom it imparts and the lessons it teaches us about love, resilience, and the interconnectedness of all living beings.

This morning, while sitting in my yard the woodpecker made an appearance. He flew right above my head, a wing almost touching my hair. As he landed on the tree I began to take in the spiritual messages.

The Resilient Drummer:

The woodpecker, with its rhythmic tapping upon the tree trunk, teaches us the art of resilience. As it tirelessly seeks sustenance, it shows us that perseverance is the key to overcoming challenges. In its persistent pursuit, it reminds us to remain steadfast in our goals and dreams. The woodpecker’s drumming serves as a gentle reminder to find strength within ourselves during difficult times. Like the woodpecker, we can tap into our inner reserves and transform obstacles into opportunities for growth.

A Call to Listen:

The woodpecker’s staccato rhythm carries a sacred message—a call to listen attentively to the whispers of nature. It beckons us to reconnect with the wisdom of the natural world and to pay heed to the gentle guidance it offers. As we attune our senses to the woodpecker’s beat, we open ourselves to the harmony and balance of the Earth, rejuvenating our spirits and nurturing our souls. Through this deep listening, we develop a profound appreciation for the interconnectedness of all living things, recognizing that we are but one thread in the intricate tapestry of existence.

Love’s Sacred Nurturer:

In its search for nourishment, the woodpecker demonstrates the sacred act of nurturing. It reminds us to care for ourselves, our loved ones, and the world around us. Just as the woodpecker diligently forages for insects hidden within the bark, we are called to unearth and tend to the hidden gems of love and compassion within ourselves and others. By extending acts of kindness, empathy, and understanding, we create a ripple effect of healing and love that reverberates throughout the universe.

The woodpecker, with its rhythmic drumming and steadfast determination, serves as a spiritual medicine for our souls. Its resilience teaches us to persevere, its call to listen reconnects us with the wisdom of nature, and its nurturing nature reminds us of the transformative power of love. As we open our hearts to the lessons the woodpecker imparts, we embrace a deeper connection to the natural world and to our own innate spiritual essence. Let us embrace the sacred rhythms of the woodpecker and embark on a journey of healing, love, and harmony with the universe.

What a lovely visitor today that came in as a spirit guide for me. I love you.

Embracing Self-Forgiveness: A Journey of Healing and Growth

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In the gentle embrace of vulnerability, I come to you today to share a powerful lesson I’ve learned on my spiritual path: the transformative power of self-forgiveness. 🌱✨

We all carry within us the weight of mistakes, regrets, and choices that have caused pain, both to ourselves and others. But dear ones, I invite you to release the burden and open your hearts to the healing energy of self-forgiveness. 💖🙏

In this sacred journey, we must first acknowledge our humanity and honor the lessons learned from our past. Remember, we are divine beings experiencing a human existence, prone to errors and missteps. It is through these experiences that our souls grow and evolve. 🌟

To forgive ourselves, we must be willing to peel back the layers of self-judgment and shame. We must surrender to the understanding that we did the best we could with the knowledge and awareness we had at that time. We are not defined by our mistakes, but rather by our capacity to learn, grow, and choose differently moving forward. 🌻

Embrace vulnerability, dear ones, for it is through vulnerability that we find the courage to face our own shadows and make peace with them. With a tender heart, let the healing energy of self-forgiveness flow through you, washing away the past and nurturing the seeds of self-love and acceptance within. 🌈💕

As you forgive yourself, remember that this is not a one-time event but an ongoing practice. Be patient and compassionate with yourself as you navigate this journey. Surround yourself with loving support and engage in soul-nurturing activities that replenish your spirit. 🌺✨

Embracing self-forgiveness is an act of liberation. It frees us from the chains of guilt and self-condemnation, allowing us to step into our true power and radiate love and compassion into the world. May you find the strength to forgive, dear ones, and may your journey of healing and growth be filled with grace and profound self-love. 💫🌟

I love you!

Love Will Teach Us

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In the grand tapestry of existence, we find ourselves on a wondrous journey of discovery and growth. It is said that we are all students of life, learning valuable lessons along the way.

But in truth, I did not come here to teach you; I came here to allow love to lead and teach me… through you.

You see, within the vastness of our souls, there resides a divine spark—a spark that emanates pure love, wisdom, and compassion. It is through this sacred essence that we truly learn and evolve. Love, my dear ones, is the ultimate teacher.

Love speaks to us in the gentle whispers of a breeze, in the tender touch of a loved one, and in the quiet moments of solitude. It is a universal language that transcends boundaries, transcends time, and connects us all as one.

When we open our hearts to love, we unlock the doors to profound understanding and enlightenment. Love illuminates the darkest corners of our being, revealing the inherent beauty that resides within us all. It teaches us acceptance, forgiveness, and the power of empathy.

It is the reason I am here. It is the reason you are here as well.

Let us be receptive to the teachings of love, for it is through love that we heal and transform. It guides us to embrace unity, to cherish every soul we encounter, and to recognize the divinity in ourselves and others.

So, my darlings, let’s walk this path together, hand in hand, with open hearts and open minds. Let love be our guiding light as we navigate the intricate dance of life. As we learn from each other, let us remember that it is love that will teach us—the profound, boundless, and eternal love that resides within our very essence.

Embrace the teachings of love, and watch as your world transforms into a sanctuary of peace, harmony, and infinite possibilities.

I love you… yesterday, today, tomorrow and forever.

Allowing for Grief

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There is this thing that happens when grief visits. It may be subtle, or it may arrive through a rage of memories. Even if you find yourself controlling your emotions, you cannot avoid it. Sure, you can drink it away, gamble it, sex it, feed it, but ultimately it will sit in your heart until you address it.

A few days ago, after an excruciating emotional week dealing with my nine-year old daughter who has been emotionally struggling, I went to the supermarket. I was rolling the cart, listening to music through my earbuds. I turned right in front of the frozen section and there was an entire placement of Little Debbie products.

I froze. I don’t know why. I don’t buy them. I don’t eat them any longer. But I stood there in some kind of suspended animation. I stared at the boxes and then a part of me left.

I was younger, mothering six children basically alone. We were sitting by our pool eating the snacks. The kids all finished and jumped back into the water. I felt my body leaning forward as if I was there about to get in as well. Then I returned to the grocery aisle, tears leaking and racing, just as if I wet my face with the pool water.

I was glad there wasn’t anyone around. I mourned for my six adult children. I ached for my two little ones who were at their father’s.  I felt paralyzed. I couldn’t move so I clenched the handle of the cart and began to use it as a walker.

I thought that I was dealing with the stressors of the week okayish. I wasn’t! I felt alone, isolated, and truly in a place of despair. I am great in crisis. It’s the aftermath that consumes me for a few days.

I paid and got to the car. I sat in it without turning it on for a good while allowing the heat to wake me from the sorrow. I let it out: the frustration, the shame, the worthlessness, and every single other emotion that was ready to join the pity party.

It wasn’t a pity party. I had to stop myself from labeling it. I had to pull the visor and look at myself in the mirror, cleaning the mascara with my hands.

“You are not okay, Millie.” I whispered to her. “It is okay not to be okay. What’s not okay is pretending. Go home and rest. This will pass. It always passes.”

I gathered myself, turning on the car and driving down the country road home. After I put the groceries away, I sat on my sofa watching the candles burning nearby. I began to meditate for a good hour, returning to the present moment.

That grief… that ache that catches us off guard… is the Divine calling to return to our soul’s essence. We make up stories, excuses, and retell old things with different views to suit the present moment. Nostalgia is dangerous that way. The further the distance from an event, the most likely the reality changes.

I have been a mother since I was twenty years old. I would like to say that it gets easier. I don’t know. Sometimes, yes. Other times it feels as if I am consumed by guilt for not doing enough, or shame for detaching so that the children learn on their own valuable lessons. On the other side of those emotions is forgiveness. I forgive myself for not knowing better, doing more, and/or not being enough when they needed me.

All eight of my kiddos are like Little Debbie’s. They are soft, scrumptious, and bring comfort to my heart. On this Mother’s Day may you have found yourself in the center of being honored for all that you do, who you are, and what you bring into their lives. You bring love. You bring hope. You bring life.

I love you.

Navigating these Times

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Oh the moon last night!!!

I woke several times during the night. I had a desire to go outside and dance under that gorgeous light. Then I remembered we have a big bear around here that loves to get in gardens and garbage. I didn’t want to be Puerto Rican meat so I opted to do the movements indoors by candle light, my blinds open to witness that giant eye in the sky.

I asked. I prayed. I released. I centered. Not much sleep afterwards. I had too much energy moving through me.

Today be gentle with you. These retrogrades, and all other astrological changes, are playing havoc on our bodies and our mental health.

Things are coming up and out because they must. We are no longer able to hide in the shadows with the shadows.

Sometimes I feel that we are becoming less human and more vibrational beings. We are returning to Source. Those who can’t decipher the difference are experiencing major setbacks.

They aren’t setting you back. They are pushing you to break through a lifetime of programming and playing it small. We don’t know what we don’t know until we do. Allow space between the not knowing and whatever is unfolding. We are moving through some of the most intense times in our history. This pushing and pulling can be catalyst for so much change in our world. But, for now concentrate on your own pathway.

Recognize your divine invaluable worth. And if you don’t have a fellow bear to worry about get outside tonight and dance under that moon.

I love you.

Forgive and Let Go

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When someone tells you how you’ve hurt them you don’t get to tell them how to feel. They are coming from their own experience and awareness.

This is also the case when someone is sharing how they’ve hurt you.

Love them anyway you can. You won’t change how they are hurting. It takes time to undo those aches, even if it was a misunderstanding. And maybe they will never see “your side” of that story. It’s not up to you to shift their narrative.

I lost my voice during my birthday week. I’ve returned from South Florida visiting with my adult children completely exhausted and depleted. The voice began to leave when someone I adore apologized to me for things I haven’t known from years ago. In my silence I have leaned into healing, for her and for me. I realized she had been holding on to things that have caused her tremendous anxiety, guilt and shame. When I explained that I forgive her she couldn’t hear it.

We shared space with my minimal amount of voice. I pray she’s released it all. I will do all I can for her to let this go even if it’s reminding her of how important she’s in my life and in this world.

Healing has millions of versions as it moves through the journey of Forgiveness. When we are hurt it takes time to mend. And maybe it never does. Perhaps that person doesn’t belong in your life anymore. Or maybe that soul was a massive teacher for you.

I’ve hurt people. People have hurt me. We’ve hurt each other. In this life it’s a certainty that it will happen again and again. Sometimes through lack of awareness. Other times, in consciousness choice.

Be gentle with yourself. Forgive and let go. If you can’t do it now, that’s okay too. There are endless lessons in grief. Loss of any kind is inexplicable.

Time doesn’t always heal those aches. Carry what you must and let go of what you can.

I love you.

A Great Spiritual Reset

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2020 brought us a massive awakening. We began to see with 20/20 vision the things that no longer fit into our lives.

Without busyness a lot of our shadow self emerged. Things we had not dealt with came up and out. They got magnified. We were confined with others who were also experiencing their own shi(f)t.

I was sure then that there would be many separations and divorces when we returned to our previous lifelines. That’s exactly what happened in my own life. There were also many who found themselves picking up a vice (or two) in order to suppress the event(s). There was abuse involved and lots of low vibrational challenges ahead. There was so much loss and anxiety and uncertainties. We are seeing things come to light now, three years later.

Take a breather. Return to this moment. Look how far you’ve come on this great spiritual reset. Step back from it all throughout your day. Recognize your truth. These times, now, are about releasing and exploring all the karmic stuff and experiences that have kept you hostage all these years. We aren’t the same. We have had major upgrades, and I feel it is going to get even more interesting this year.

At this time you may be triggered by your partner, kids, parents, friends, neighbors and the media. You may be rubbed and irritated by the things, that before these times, didn’t trigger you. You may even fantasize of how different your life could be. You keep getting these intense nudges that something is “off” or not quite right in your life. You may be feeling into the massive anger and hurt in the collective, and because you are a super-empath, you feel that it’s yours.

It’s not. And, it is!

That other life that began three years ago is completely different. You may be questioning your purpose here. You may be dreaming of how to reinvent yourself professionally. You are also recognizing that simplicity is your new reality. You didn’t need all the heavy distractions. You don’t need all the things that used to make you happy.

Now, if you aren’t experiencing these obstacles, that’s okay too. I am so happy you are stable and able to live in your truth. This is your life. I believe our timelines have shifted or split. There is no returning to that other one because your experiences now are forcing a new life for you. You will never be the same.

My suggestion to you at this time is to deal with the dark side of your personality. It’s time to ascend and in order to do so you can no longer put that side of you on hold. You can no longer neglect healing it. Those triggers that keep being nudged or poked are trying to tell you something from your higher self. “It’s time to reset and clear the hurt that passed through your life.” Heal the past and work on releasing it. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. That irritation in you creates a crack that is allowing light to enter. The pressure may be too much to handle at times. Just know it will pass.

The struggle is real for many of us. I promise that you will emerge through a complete metamorphosis. It isn’t pretty. It is definitely uncomfortable. But… sigh, I feel you will choose the best outcome for you and your family. We are living in fascinating times and it feels hard. We make it harder with our thoughts. We were NOT meant to struggle this way. We have been programmed to believe in things and experiences that have nothing to do with the evolution of our souls.

I love you.

Millie

Climb Those Mountains

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I’ve had several weeks of smallness. I’ve needed to make my life tiny in order to make big decisions and concentrate on some changes. It’s always a gift to create distance and move inward to what Spirit is conveying.

So…I meditate. I get out in nature. I travel far beyond the dimensions. I make sure to have no chaos or distractions from those around me. Because, ultimately, I need to care for me in order to care for others.

I’m super selfish with my “me time.” I will not comprise for anything unless it’s an emergency. I am blessed to have friends and family who allow me this time with so much respect. No one gets rattled or offended when I don’t reach out during my hiatus.

I’m no good if I can’t distance myself from the naysayers. I get to a point that I just can’t do anything but be…alone. I truly go on shutdown. Lately, this has been a theme on social media and once I turn it off, the magic happens in a way that blows my heart wide open.

We move and make decisions based on experiences and our personal level of awareness. I cannot ask others to help me when they have not experienced the challenges. And believe me, everyone has an opinion the moment you make things public. Everyone starts to tell you how you need to live based on what they’ve experienced. People are moved through fear in most cases. And then it’s transposed on to our human spirit.

But your higher self leads the way. It is your internal GPS. It knows truth. It begins to guide you to continue trekking.

Every mountain you choose to climb begins with small steps. If you go too fast you start to feel the unhealthy pressure and lack of breath. You allow fear to take over in that momentum. The tinier the steps the more endurance you accumulate. It might take longer but to climb a high mountain you need to truly be mindful of your life substance… your breath. You have to continue the self pep talks. You must believe in yourself beyond anything else.

GO climb your mountains. Regardless how others react. Go after your goals in spite of the naysayers. Take chances. Pick a path along the journey even when there are a million deviations. Keep climbing. Keep breathing. Keep focusing on what you want. In my life time I have heard a million opinions “you can’t do that!” I have made it and looked back and realized that I believed in myself more than anyone has believed in me. I’ve done some impossible things that have no logical explanation. And I don’t require logic to create through mysticism.

I have faith!

Your life is a blessing made up of so many magical moments. Don’t allow anyone to instill their shit on you. Ever! You begin to create the life you desire the moment you put on those hiking boots and start walking towards your purpose. The higher your purpose the more people will try to pull you down. It’s all a game and you get to decide how you participate.

You can do anything you want. I promise. But start with your inner awareness and full heart belief. Love yourself enough to turn the impossible into possible.

I love you,
Millie

It Only Takes One Person

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Many years ago I attended a Tony Robbins seminar. It was gifted to me from a dear friend. I was in the worst financial crisis of my life, at the time. Our business had gone under. My ex and I had built a home and we were depleted. Creditors demanded their money. I was under the illusion that it was the end of everything. My fear of being homeless with six children was paralyzing me. It was absolutely one of the worst periods of my life. I was in a dark hole and I could not shake the grief/shame of the circumstances. To make matters even more interesting I had an accident months prior that erased my memories of many events from the past. I was struggling to make sense of every decision and every choice.

I questioned my purpose. I questioned my sanity. I was barely surviving.

I attended the weekend seminar (hesitantly). Tony has an ability to pump you up. He is all energy and I sure needed that. In the midst of all the exercises he mentioned that when he started his teachings and lectures he had decided that quantity didn’t matter. If one person showed up to his lectures then that was the one soul who needed it. I don’t remember much else except the feeling that I could do anything. That weekend catapult me into other amazing beliefs about myself.

That seminar was back in 2002. To this day I have kept that lesson close to my heart. If one person reads one of my posts or blogs then that’s the one who needs it. If one person is touched by my words then I have done my duty as a human to help another. You never know how you may be affecting another. You might just be the lifeboat that saves their ass that day.

We are in a society that believes that our worth is determined by how many “likes” we receive. We are obsessed with numbers and the need to be accepted. And this is not who we are. I grew up in a generation that didn’t have symbols on a screen to determine our worth.

When you compliment a person on the street, or at a store, or on the phone you might just be that one soul who has really seen him/her. You might just be the lifeline that allows them not to feel invisible. You might change their world with your acknowledgement. It’s that simple.

It only takes one person!

So…keep doing what you do. Keep showing up. Keep sharing with the world. Keep striving to be light for others. Even if it’s just one person that shines a little brighter because of you…you’ve done your job in human form. It only takes one person, darling!

I love you. I see you. I feel you. I understand. You are not alone.

Millie