The Lonely Journey

When asked about the common subjects people talk to me about I always say “Love and Spirit.” People will share their love and stories without filter. It’s a given! They will unload information in a heart beat.

The second subject is always along the lines of spiritual deprivation. Folks are in need of magic, mysticism, miracles, and faith. They want to know that there are others out there with the same curiosity and open-conscious level of understanding. They want to know that this is just not all of it…you know, the concept of living just to pay bills. Because, frankly, it’s not!

I am blessed to know (and my list continues to grow) hundreds of spiritual people. They are from all walks of life: Christians, Buddhists, Jews, Muslims, and even non-denominational. I also know many religious folks who come across as spiritual but in truth they are all mind and no heart. To me spirituality is having a compassionate heart tied to a faith in something greater than ourselves that is non-violent and non-judgmental. If you are judging, criticizing and pointing all sorts of fingers to another while reciting God’s name, well darling, you aren’t spiritual. You are something else. Unfortunately there are a lot of religions based on the mastery of manipulation and the heart has to be taken out of the equation. You cannot love and hate at the same time. Impossible!

Ah…the beauty of entertaining like-minded souls is in the allowance. We are able to openly discuss many subjects of the conscious mind. I notice there is still a massive disconnection. We are suffering from spiritual deprivation. I know they are millions feeling this massive shift of awareness, however, due to the overwhelming negativity of the pointing-fingers syndrome, no one discusses their faith with anyone. No one wants to be ridiculed. No one wants to die. The deprivation grows larger and before you know we are all scattered and left to fend for ourselves and spirit.

Spirituality is a lonely path. My steps cannot be walked by you and vice versa. We can, however, compare the paths. We can discuss the different ways we come into prayer, contemplation and meditation. We can share experiences that are beyond this realm. We can go deep into conversations about stars, planets, and cosmic energy. We can trust in each other when someone shares something that is fantastic and magical. Just because you haven’t experienced it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. I haven’t experienced homelessness but I sure believe in it. I haven’t experienced war but I now it’s there. So, these are folks that want more. They crave for spiritual knowledge. They eat, sleep, watch and read all sorts of information trying to rationalize or enrich their faith. For centuries religions have done this. It’s part of our DNA, we must grow into the unknown. It’s pretty sad that in today’s world we can still be deprived by the simplest forms of human needs: mind, body and spirit.

I don’t have answers on how to find more spiritual connections. I really haven’t a clue. At least ten times a week I get a message from someone asking for spiritual retreats, meet-ups, or just comments on wanting connections with Spirit. I can only tell you that at times what you are looking for in others is right inside of you if you just sit long enough to listen.

I am determined to raise my vibration to the highest form of love and dispel negative emotions. When I’m having a bad day, or worrying over crap, I need to quiet the ego bitchiness and center myself to what matters. I have to return to Source. I enter quietude through meditation or writing or just being in nature. It’s in those moments that Spirit visits me. It’s in those precious minutes that the universe cradles me with unbelievable forms of awareness through love. And, it’s also in those times that forgiveness arrives and I can let go of all that is causing me such turmoil and chaos. I walk away feeling like me. I am still a spiritual being having a human experience. I am choosing to make it less dense with emotional baggage.

You have the answers to all your spiritual questions. You carry with you the spiritual knowledge to change, feed and enhance your life through divine guidance. You are all there is. Sure it’s awesome to share with others. Heck yeah! It’s comforting to know you aren’t bat-ass crazy and the looney farm has a room with your name on it waiting for you to check yourself in. That’s always wonderful to acknowledge.

Likes attract likes. If you want more spiritually grounded individuals in your life you have to become one yourself without the fear of being scrutinized. You also have to look around your circle and realize when you have to let go of toxic energy. You have to put yourself in the arms of respect and self-worth. What good will it do you to find spiritual folks and then return to a place that destroys the yummy energy?

Go love you. Go believe in yourself. Go be spiritual through the forest, by the shoreline, over the desert, on a mountain top. I’m so glad we have each other. Now go be the yummiest version of you. Just BE! You got this!

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Cycles and Stories

We move through cycles of what was and what is. And, somewhere in between lies the illusion that these things make us whole and become our stories. Your story might be raw and full of pain, or it might consist of happiness and delightful moments. You have been embraced by love and lovers (past and present), but in the end it is this very second that glues us together. You have lost a loved one to death or just the ending of a relationship and it hurts like hell but you are still here surfing the ebb of deep waters.

This is Sacred Presence.

This is part of expansion.

This is a raw and vulnerable ability to stay here and share while connecting to another by saying, “I am here for you. You are not alone. I understand. I have experienced something similar. Or, I haven’t and it is beautiful how you are moving with grace, strength and faith.”

Yes, these are the moments that make us whole through the veil of life. These are the days that move through us in the subconscious with changes and growth. We don’t know it but there’s a shift inside. This new year is one full of growth and adventure. You have been tested for so long that you have forgotten what it is to just be in sacred presence.

We can’t look back and know when things changed and we gave up but they are there. Today I am making changes to a new opportunity to find joy in the little things. These non-judgmental days of self awareness are huge mile markers.

Today…Tomorrow…Every single morning is an opportunity for me to expand my heart and consciousness.

Keep searching for your truth. It isn’t always pretty or perfect or without some hurt…but it is your truth. These are the things that have created your humanness to continue expanding in our world. The conscious shift in knowing and acceptance is evolving within you always. And how MARVELOUS you are, darling! Go be all that greatness you are meant to be!!!! Together we make some yummy magic. Mucho love.

Be Soft with You

Be soft with your spirit. Be gentle with your essence. BE authentic to your purpose and calling. Rid yourself from the negative self-talk. You become everything you say that you are or that you are not. We are born every day, every minute, every second. We are here on borrowed time. Make it lovingly serene with your heart so that you can present your soul lovingly to another. This struggle is all bullshit at the end of the day. It doesn’t matter what you did or haven’t done. This moment, wasted reading this, or contemplating what hasn’t been scratched off your To Do List, is all irrelevant.

Really…this is nonsense. All the fake-ness of pretending and showing others a different person in order to fit in society. I want to know YOU…the real you that cries in your car, gets giddy at the first dog you see in the street…the YOU that loves the moon and stars.

There are folks losing their jobs, their homes, and families. There are others sitting alone in a hospital room watching a loved one fight for their lives. While some others are in the petty claws of political and religious arguments on social media…life is happening out there. Life is happening in here. Life is a series of ongoing movements and motions reminding us that we get to pick the perception and reaction.

I don’t know why bad things happen. I don’t know why anything happens. I would like to believe it’s for the evolution of our higher self. I would like to believe it’s part of a larger design. Who truly knows at this point? I have to be led by faith and that onset programming of a higher body of spirit guiding me.

What I do know is that we need one another. We need a tribe. We need love. YES…lots of love and to turn on our hearts to accept and spread it.

We need to know that we aren’t alone in the path of obstacles and challenges. We need to get out of our own head space and truly feel the vibration of another who is part of the overall conscious mass and start shifting towards changing the negatives to positives.

Hold a friend’s hand in need. Hug your lover as if it was the last time. Kiss those kids tightly. Smile at a stranger. Open doors for an elderly person. Compliment a cashier. Delete the toxic folks out of your life. If they don’t raise you then they have taught you something. It’s time to move on. Use your energy wisely. Just get out of your freaking head and lovingly give to another who needs to feel that the illusion of loneliness is not drowning their existence. It matters. It all matters to that one human who is struggling with life.

Stop the craziness of self doubt and anxiety because there is no way you leave this life alive. STOP focusing on the lack of anything and start creating by living in joy. So…live for yourself with honor, love, and compassion. You don’t own this blue planet alone. I am here. You are here. Let’s be here together in peace and harmony. Let’s be raised by love and light. We got this! ~m.a.p.

Apathy

I am reminded at times that not everyone is on the same level of acceptance and awareness that I have grown to embody as my beautiful life. I come across folks with hate and indifference. I come across people from all walks of life. I usually know who I can approach and who I am not to throw my love bombs to.

Leo Buscaglia in his LOVE book shared, “I have a very strong feeling that the opposite of love isn’t hate —it’s apathy. It’s not giving a damn. If somebody hates me, they must ‘feel’ something about me or they couldn’t possibly hate. Therefore, there’s some way in which I can get to them.”

I agree with him. Hate is strong and it is based on fear and judgment. I feel apathy is based on knowing and then coming to something deeper in emotional body of indifference. Not caring. Not giving time to something. Apathy is the lack of…rather than the rage and anger that comes with hate.

So when someone says, for example, “I hate homosexuals” and they don’t know any homosexuals personally, it isn’t hate. It’s lack of understanding. It’s lack of knowledge. It’s lack of humanness. It’s indifference. But it’s not hate because it can’t be personal if you don’t interact with someone who is gay. That indifference and ignorance dictates their emotions. Usually this comes from lack of education.

So, when I am around someone who hates this, and hates that, I try to stay open to what love can actually teach this person. Apathy permits me to enter a door of opportunities to be heard. I can sit with them and listen to their story about something they don’t know much about and alter their view through a loving manner. Because in most cases their dislike is taught and transferred (or projected), I can also share my personal experiences.

It doesn’t always work. But I continue to show up with as much love as I can to alter their perception. We meet folks at the level of their awareness, not ours.

I can turn apathy into love a lot quicker than hate. Hate comes from personal experience. Love is the antidote for apathy.

Let’s find the way to change the lack of anything and turn it into the love for everything. I vow to keep loving in such a profound manner than the person feeling the love cannot deny it. I plan on healing through an open heart and joy.

And you…how will you help heal this planet? How will you continue raising the vibrations to help shift consciousness? Do share please!

Let It Go

Yesterday morning, as I was dropping this baby off at daycare he squeezed my cheeks in, looked into my eyes smiling, and said, “Mama, letttt itttt goooo!”

He’s not watched Frozen. Lol.

I was taken aback. I say this all the time when he’s holding something and I need to change him or get him in the car seat. But, as he said it I recognized this was coming from a little conscious soul-to-soul messenger. I had been struggling for a few days holding “stuff” inside.

His let-it-go message was clear. I put my head against his forehead as we do before saying goodbye and kissed him.

He’s such a special little boy. Being in his presence immediately brings anyone joy.

When a child gives you a message take it to heart. It’s coming from a deep conscious knowing.

Now you…yes, you…let it go and move on. I love you.

Happy New Beginnings

I’ve sat and lounged more than enough this last holiday. It was yummy to be among family. It was by far one of the easiest and loving holidays ever.

What changed?

Me.

I allowed for it to come and go while being present. Even with severe allergies I allowed for the moments to come and go. I let go of the sorrow that comes with those days of celebration. I became aware of where the grief revisited and I addressed it like never before.

It felt like sacredness and a preview of what’s coming this new year. It feels like how I will allow the new beginnings.

The need to push isn’t here. The desire to create always is. But, I create and manifest by feeling through the desires without control. Just knowing I’m always aligning to my highest calling. This is a powerful acceptance!

That was the biggest lesson in 2018.

I am so happy to enter a new year with deeper awareness than last one. I’m in no rush to see what’s coming. For now I am chillaxing and allowing the universal forces to drive.

Wishing you a magical new everything. Be in it without pushing anything. And, darling, put the love for you first and foremost. Once you do everything and everyone around you starts to feel that vibration.

I love you. You. You. You.

Love Notes to Humanity

Yesterday, before my boys left, we stopped at Barnes & Noble. It was crowded with the remains of Holiday folks. I waited by the magazines while the boys looked for their books. I remembered years ago when I moved to Asheville how that store was my saving grace. When the winter hit hard that year I was stuck up on the mountain and my only outlet was to come into town to the bookstore. I had been stripped of all monetary means. A friend and I bought an old motel that took everything I had. She went off to work for the winter and I was left with two teenagers and a deep isolation that pushed my soul into a spiritual awakening.

The mountain taught me invaluable lessons. The motel endorsed those experiences. At the time I didn’t recognize how priceless those obstacles would become. I learned to trust my intuition. I was snowed in more than I could ever imagined. I spent time without electricity and water. And I knew not one soul.

My outlet was coming into town once a week if I could make it down the roads. I packed a bunch of Post It notes and typed up letters. I would sit in a hidden corner of the store and write inspirational notes to put in books and magazines. In the mental health books I would leave “You are magnificent. You are here to make the world brighter.” In the glamour magazines, especially those for teenagers, I would leave something along the lines of “You are more beautiful than any photo shopped girl here. You are here to make a world a better place.” And on and on I would go around and just post the little love notes around the store. It filled me up with joy.

The letters I called, “Love Note from the Universe” I would fold and place in the windshield of cars in the parking lot. Those were longer. And deeper. I would watch from the second floor of the store as people would grab them. Some would open them up and read them, always checking around to see if they saw anyone. Many times they were thrown on the grown or crumbled up in their car.

I had the time to do these things. I have lost my way with busyness the last few years working full time, raising small children, taking care of lives (especially mine). They aren’t excuses. It’s just the way it’s been. It’s a different journey now, but yesterday I ached to start again doing those things that touched the core of me: going to the homeless shelter and having coffee; taking books to the VA Hospital; gathering stories from all walks of life. I ached for a moment so deeply for those simple acts of kindness that my chest felt like it cracked open. I gasped for a bit of air and recognized my soul’s call. I know it well!

This new year I plan on being more present with humanity. I vow to write Love Notes to Humanity and share all the stories from around my world. We are united by the act of connections, feeling acknowledged, listening, and knowing we are not alone on this journey.

The other day I was getting in my car from the supermarket. It was drizzling. An elderly couple was in front of my car. He held the umbrella and was trying to get his partner into the car. It was sweet to witness. I wondered at that moment how many years they had been together. He actually kissed the top of her fragile hand when she got in and closed her door, getting a bit wet then slowly dragging his feet to come around to the driver’s side. And without words, their story became mine. Love Notes for Humanity. Their actions became the driven force to go home and be gentler, more loving, and accepting of whatever was to come with all the buzzing from the holidays. A few times this week I have returned to that elderly couple in my memories. I smile thinking of their lives. And I am blessed to have them now become part of mine.

You are part of mine by just being here. Never, for one moment, do I take that for granted. I love you. May you also begin to collect and create love notes in your life from all of humanity. We need more of that!