Unhealed People

I spent a large part of my life hiding. Recently, after a healing session with an incredible soul, I recognized the patterns and programming. I shared with an old friend who immediately said, “Oh honey, you’ve been hiding all your life. I’m so sorry!”

Her sorry was genuine and my tears flowed out again. She saw me. Really saw the trail of bullshit left behind by a Narcissistic mother. And I’ve been working on cutting cords for so long. I tend to listen to the voices of the past when I try to lead my children in the now. I don’t want to be like my mother. I second guess every single major decision in spite of what my heart and intuition show me.

In spite of all my deep awareness and knowing I am not exempt from all my human lessons and challenges. I am always on the trail of mending.

Healing is about release. It’s surrendering to the now while letting go of what has kept you captive. This can be physical, emotional or spiritual. I don’t believe in examining and re-examining the past because that story is no longer there. We create new ones but at some point ancestral wounds need to be cut.

Sometimes we don’t really know what’s inside no matter how much we work on ourselves. It takes an outsider to guide your spirit on a new journey and quest.

Here is what I continue to learn daily: unhealed people hurt through their unknowing-ness. They don’t recognize they are hurting anyone, especially a child. As I continue to feel seen the vulnerability is heighten. I am no longer a little chubby scared girl feeling judged by the world. I am no longer a 20 something woman walking on eggshells afraid of what others think of me.

The healing sticks when we become aware of how we allow toxic energy from others. Those folks continue to show up to remind us of our growth. I am blessed they continue to show me how to set healthy boundaries.

I hope you can also see them and send them love. You don’t have to participate in their dramas. I see you. I honor you. I love you.

Life is Epic

I woke this morning sick of my stories, the drama I repeat, and the never ending struggle to find peace among the storms that are not real but living in my little head. It’s sickening. This being, and just allowing, is not for sissies. No one said that the spiritual walk was meant to BE a walk in the park! It takes massive amount of discipline and I don’t follow orders very well…even when it’s from the esoteric world. So…I got up…did my meditation…had to stop right in the middle and said, “F*@k this crap! I can do this. I have manifested incredible experiences in this lifetime. I can let this go and move on without this struggle. This is my own ego creating this shit! I am more than this scene, this stage, and this production!!!”

I got up turning the “cannot” into “will do.”

We have the complete capacity and power to change our thoughts. In those moments I feel the swirl of energy directing me into joy, faith, and love. The heart opens up when I let go of the toxic stories I retell myself. It’s just a shift in perception. I promise.

Aren’t you sick of your same old stories, drama, struggles, and total bullshit (because it is just crap)? Then change the channel…tune into the mass consciousness of love…for you and the world. Get out of your head. Get out of your way…you got this! I know it may all feel heavy at this moment.

Put it down. Stop giving it power. Move away from it for a little while. You may come back to it at another time.

Onward and outward, darlings. Take one breath at a time and move through your knowing. Accept your magnificence and inner guidance. That is your internal GPS. Reroute if you must. But keep going.

Have a blessed day! I love you.

Living Consciously

Living a life full of conscious awareness is not easy. We have to take responsibility for our lives and everything that happens in it. We cannot blame the world for what happens, will happen or never happens. We have choices. These choices are part lessons and part programming. The spiritual process of letting go requires shutting up the ego and living by faith…the knowing and accepting those things that aren’t in the comfort zone. It’s a matter of accepting the ugliness, the failures, the shame, the disgust and also all the wonderful experiences. We are made of duality. We need the dark in order to have the light and vice versa.

A simple definition for insanity is repeating the same thing over and over while expecting a different result. Detect the projections of others and your participation! Accept your responsibility in your story! Reject the same markers of dramatically filled egos! You got this. You do NOT have to continue living through past markers. You have the power to change the programming and move forward into a life that’s free of hurt and loss. We are not meant to struggle in such a way that we become paralyzed to the freedom of self-love and self-acceptance. Our worth is NOT suppose to be sacrificed. On the other side of this backward mind belief is JOY waiting to be embraced. Your authenticity is powerful and you are the only who can get you there…stop looking at the rear view mirror…you don’t live there anymore! Check out the beauty ahead!!!

Sacred Living through the Mundane

Faithful beginnings are led by sacred endings. Sometimes we are caught in the in-between for a bit waiting for the signs of what’s coming. It’s not an easy space to be. It’s full of unknowns and uncertainties. We forget to live in the moment, especially during these wobbly times. We keep thinking about tomorrow and next month… instead of taking in the NOW.

I urge you to make time for aloneness, for yourself, for your spirit. It is then that answers come and there is full clarity. These moments come in so many different manners throughout our days.

I love humans. I love connections. And, although, I will talk to anyone and anything, I need time alone. I can dive into a book and get lost; watch a movie and enjoy the solitude; and eat with silence as my companion. And, even with two small children I will steal moments of solitude as often as I can. To breathe and return to mindfulness and deep awareness.

I will be sharing 30 days of mindful-sacred living (even through the mundane of our daily lives) on my Sacred Journey Facebook page starting on Tuesday for the entire month of September… every morning. It’s easy to feel as if we need to retreat from our lives in order to re-energize, but it isn’t so.

Make a date with yourself often. Give your brain a break. Have mini vacations alone for moments here and there. You need restoration and recharging. We all do. But there is so much we can do without escaping our lives. The world is pretty chaotic and our spirits need to be reminded that we get to choose how we show up.

It’s a new month. New beginnings. And lovely experiences. Hope to see you over in the page.

Expansion of Consciousness

“Consciousness is the highest word you will ever utter.” -Michael A. Singer

Here we are experiencing the expansion of consciousness. Every single day. Lately more intense than other times. Some folks aren’t handling it well. It’s that extreme. The more empathetic you are the harder it feels to stay grounded.

So we feel it in the physical body. We feel it in our emotional stories. We are navigating some amazing times and it’s conjuring up lots of release and old paradigms.

Stop beating yourself up for the past. Stop replaying the stories from yesteryears. Stop trying to make the past fit into your present life, and adjusting it to recreate in the future. Whatever belief you have will manifest quickly so be mindful of what you want. Energy doesn’t lie and it also doesn’t decipher from negative or positive. It attaches to all that is happening now. We are evolving and ascending to higher realms of consciousness.

If you are struggling recognize that you aren’t alone. We are here for each other. Reach out please. Sending love to all.

Don’t Feed Fears

I feel that we give our fears power when we don’t talk about them. The secrets and worries we hold inside reinforce that toxic energy. We give it (or them) life. We add a vibration into our lives by obsessing on those “things” we don’t share out of shame or guilt or old programming.

One of my old personality programs has been controlled. I fall into a fearful moment of feeling as if another (or a system) is controlling my decisions. There is a difference between being influenced and handing over my complete life to another. I ask often, “how is this fear of being controlled running my life?” In most cases it isn’t. It’s all an illusion. It’s old experiences of feeling helpless in situations. I have grown enough to know that I am in complete authority of my decisions and choices. And, I give room to the unexpected and wonderful divine guidance.

What do you fear that stops you from moving forward at this time? What Influences you to feed those fears?

This is a non-judgment zone, darlings.

Sending love your way.

Where is Home for You

Each time I step away for a bit into nature I mumble to myself, “I am Home.” Then I ask myself on the next breath, “What is that? What is it that defines home?”

At times home is a description, an intricate noun of familiarity setting a place, person, or thing to feel a connection to our soul. I am home with my children around me feeling safe. I am home while holding a friend’s hand in need. I am home through laughter and deep conversations. But my true home, where I find peace, solace and acceptance, is nature. Whether it be on a river kayaking or collecting heart-shaped rocks, or sitting on a giant boulder witnessing a waterfall, I am home again. The outside world becomes an illusion. Struggles don’t exist in the mind.

Nature doesn’t judge or asks anything of what I’m not. It accepts my essence in just being present in the stillness of the now. In these moments problems melt, and like decomposed soil, I shred the inklings of my humanness and become light in spirit. It is meditation at its finest. It is life at its sweetest. Nature allows me to get lost and find myself in the center of the universe. I will always search for glimpses of nature throughout my days.

Home.
It’s the seat of our soul. It’s the essence of awareness. It’s the OM of all universal wisdom. May you find it like we did today. And may you also feel the call of God through those things you witness.

Where is home for you? Please share in comments. I love you.

Listen

I speak to you through here, through the vastness of love frequency, and the spaces between the words.

Listen…

Here is the thing… to shut yourself off from the world is pure insanity. It is a great injustice. We are not made to live without love. We are not made to put up walls. We are to continue growing through those losses. I’ve lost no more, and no less, than anyone else. I have lost physically and mentally while in those losses I have doubted my humanity, my self-worth, and my ability to keep going. I have loved time and time again and have been hurt. I’m not exempt from heartache. I have left the warmth and comfort in not wanting relationships to then dive in and get hurt. I have been ruptured and stitched up again. I have seen the beauty in mindful love and the downside of giving all that I am. It’s been worth the ride.

I remember telling someone that a break like that truly feels like a giant crack inside. I believe it is then that the fracture allows for the heart to expand and grow to love deeper. Perhaps I am delusional. I just know that the times that I have ended relationships, or death has taken someone, the pain is so immense that my soul needs time alone to recuperate. I literally feel the ache coming from my chest. I also feel the light healing it. It is in those moments that the tears wash everything out and I realize that faith is the only means of transportation. I have no regrets because the child in me only wants love and to be loved. The woman in me recognizes that I am not invisible. Love is my essence. If loving entails loss… well that’s a mighty hefty price that needs to be paid. Love is part of conscious living. You must give it in order to breathe.

We are not exempt from disappointments, deaths, breakups, tragedies, and anything under the scope of loss. Loss is the vulture that cleans our insides. While its in there anger, resentment, guilt, shame, and a kaleidoscope of emotions rise. Loss eats every aspect of hope and then allows for new cells to rebuild. If we live long enough we will see the immense power of hatred as well as the magnitude of love. This is your life. This is my life. This is life. Do not confine yourself to a prison of safety by not opening your heart to the world. You will miss out in other ways that Spirit can gift you through the magic of love. You are not alone. May you find the courage to love again and again for the rest of your life!

Love, darling. Love with all that you are and continue feeling it all. Don’t stop or shut yourself through fear. Through love you find the Divine in you and the Divinity in others.

I love you.

Go For It

I don’t have an answer to what you are suppose to do tomorrow. I ask that you follow the yearning… your soul’s most fierce desire. It might take one day. It might take forty years. Perhaps there are things you have to learn before getting to that moment.

I don’t know.

You have the answers. We always know. We just have to listen to our own guidance instead of everyone else.

So start with your desire. Follow through with your imagination. Let the universe align to it all. You aren’t meant to be here to struggle like this. We aren’t put here for that.

Make sure you are allowing positive thoughts to dictate your days. This shi(f)t isn’t always easy. But it is YOUR story and what you do with it.

You are magic. Start acting like it. Now get out there and raise your vibration to LOVE. Everything you desire is on the other side of fear. Go get it. Move through love. That’s where it begins… and ends.

I love you.

Love

Love…

Such a simple and complex emotion.

We birth it.

We give it.

We take it.

We buy it and sell it.

We hand it over unconditionally.

We bury it.

We add boundaries around it.

We hurt. We grow. We break.

We silently ache for it.

We attach things to it.

We hold and and release it.

We create a world around it.

We learn from it.

We evolve and transcend in spirit because of it.

It’s a noun, a verb, and everything in between.

We love people, places, animals, things and so much more.

It’s life.

It is the reason we live, inspire, and connect.

It is the compass of the soul.

And it will always guide you if you listen.

Every single one of you holds directions through it.

Every particle of your being energetically vibrates to its purpose.

Where will it take you today?