Life is a Journey

I’m reminded, often, that when things start to run smoothly there may be a fork on the road (or a sink hole in the path) and I must learn a new way to navigate. I must become mindful of how to continue traveling.

It’s life.

It consists of ups and downs. It has mountains and valleys. It has really beautiful terrains and some very challenging ones. It has amazing weather and catastrophic storms. I have learned to trust in what I can’t see…but wholeheartedly feel.

I am led by magic.

And I pray a lot. I meditate daily. I also freaking negotiate with my higher guidance, counsel with God, and hold deep meetings with angels because I am, after all, the CEO of my life. I need all the help I can get. I am not alone on this spiritual walk in this human vehicle.

This doesn’t exempt me from worrying. It doesn’t separate my ego from the equation. I have lessons to learn along the journey. Some are brutal. Some are mystical. Some are intimately sacred. Some are full of more questions than answers.

Today may be okay. Tomorrow may be amazing. The next day may just be the worst of all days. But it all evens out if I am willing to view (and accept) this life as an adventure of extraordinary gifts.

Don’t let a bad season determine your worth. I have to remind myself of this too. Trust in your knowing. Stop the naysayers from influencing your emotions. Detox your life from everything and everyone who doesn’t lift you. You know you, and your life, better than anyone else.

You have so many delicious days ahead. You get to design the life you want by the choices you make. You get to show up on this journey and decide which path you take. Take the one with least resistance. Believe me!

I love you.

Do Not Allow Anyone to Steal your Peace

Last week I came across someone who deeply hurt me years ago. The friendship ended and it was brutal. I had trusted and loved this person with all my heart. The relationship dissolved. There was so much loss that it took a year just to pull myself out of a dark hole. There was never closure and I was okay with that because I avoid confrontations. It took several years to really trust another woman like a sister. And even now…I am guarded at times.

The moment I saw her my immediate feeling was joy. I sent the love and compassion out with elation. I smiled most of the day. She did not see me. I was just happy to know she was doing so well. I know (and felt) that part of our parting ways was traumatic issues of abandonment from her past. I could not fill her needs and I had my own journey to travel and heal.

We aren’t here to fix anyone. We can extend a hand but we cannot be the bandaid or stitches for them. Because what happens is toxic. You cannot fill them up with what they are lacking.

But, I was truly grateful to have seen her from a distance.

Then I slept on it.

My compassionate heart had allowed ego to talk some senseless bull shit script. I woke the next morning beyond angry. I didn’t recognize myself. I felt nothing of the precious love from the prior day. There was definitely unresolved wounds there. And, boy, was I gonna dig deep to remove that last root! It’s been years. I take full responsibilities for my own downfall in that relationship. In all relationships!

I spent several days sending her extra love and forgiveness. I dedicated my meditation practice to her and released any false expectation that I felt I deserved. I had moved past closure years ago. I was able to just be without the chit chat or what would I have said to her had she seen me. I stopped the fantasy of a conversation that does not need to happen.

It worked. After five days I was back to feeling a sense of peace. The toxic energy moved on. That’s the same toxic energy that consumed us the last few years of our friendship.

I recognized the peace and calmness that transitioned when I was at a distance. And this returned with a deeper love and appreciation for her. I wish her well and sent all my love…from here.

If you find yourself returning to an old wound please accept it’s not healed. When you heal you don’t feel the hurt so deeply. You can detach from it and move on. If the hurt continues then it’s time to cut energetic cords and really send love. Hate never trumps love. Never. Love truly is the highest vibrational tool for healing.

Healing requires the utmost vulnerability of authenticity. It asks that you be honest. It whispers that you honor your soul. Write those letters and burn them. Send your good intentions and release them.

You got to do what is best for YOU. If this means breaking up with your old habits, programming and ideas…then let it be.

Love yourself enough to walk away from all that no longer serves you: a job, a relationship, or anything else. Feel what you feel and make no apology for it. But truly validate yourself. You deserve the love you give to everyone else.

I love you.

Let me help you

When my husband and I started dating he shared a story about his ex-wife. He believed he would never measure up to what she wanted in a partner and husband. He told me that she expected him to be Jesus in a pair of jeans. She wanted the religious figure in a normal man. No matter what he did he would never be perfect.

No one is. No one will ever be. That kind of expectation is inconceivable. But this was his story of why his marriage didn’t end with a happily ever after. The more he tried the less she was willing to meet him.

I remember this conversation sitting across from him at a diner. I still remember taking it all in and how he looked as he shared the story. After all, it was his story. And I began to question my own past stories and how my ex possibly saw me (or the lack of me…for that matter).

What truly happens when we dive into the old stories is that we also return to the feelings via some magical time machine. We begin to experience it all over again. We allow the stories at times to dictate our current events. We get stuck in this toxic loop and we can’t figure out how to change the emotions.

But…they are…stories. They are chronological events that create our future, especially if we don’t learn to heal. They are part of our history. At times the further distance we have from these stories the more complex we make them; the more distortion we also create. We give them more power than those stories deserve. We continue to manifest that things we know as true.

I collect stories from all walks of life. Even when someone hasn’t verbally shared. I have some bizarre gift of just knowing increments of their history. It’s not always a wonderful feeling. Sometimes it feels like a curse.

We move into our daily lives based on our past experiences. We get to this present moment transcending from our history. How we perceive those experiences determines how we evolve spiritually, physically and emotionally.

My husband has moved past those experiences through heartache and acceptance. I have done the same. We have learned to navigate the past, molding new journeys that include our partnership. That’s the relating part of relationships. We, together, have learned to flow into one another while releasing the past. By being together we have moved on to new and improved stories.

I’m here, darlings, building a business based on helping others rewrite their old beliefs and programming. I can help you edit your story so you do not feel stuck or reliving the same challenges.

Send me a message if you want to schedule a session (face to face or long distance). Our stories are powerful. They are amazing. But, they aren’t meant to keep you in an invisible prison that doesn’t allow you to live your best life.

Let’s work together through deep intuitive counseling to reach old beliefs and help rewrite a freer you. You do not deserve to continue living in a loop of resentments and self-sabotage.

Email: dharma.1111@hotmail.com.

Unexpected Moments

I received a call at work today from a man asking for one of our employees. I gave him her number and he stopped me, “Is this Millie?”

“Yes it is.”

“Oh goodness. Today is my lucky day…” He tells me his name in complete giddiness.

“You might not remember me but you changed my life one really bad morning about a year ago.”

I said, “oh noooo! What the heck did I say to you?”

“I was having a horrible day. I was actually having a really bad time in my life. You somehow noticed it in my voice and you kept me talking. A total stranger. You just let me talk and you said to me (he starts to giggle) you gotta put on your big boy pants, darling. One bad day doesn’t make a bad life. I’m feeling you (and when you said that I started to cry)… you kept me talking until I broke down and all this before 8am.

He continued to share that after our phone call he decided to make a list of what brought him joy. And he changed jobs, moved from where he was living and completely pushed through the bad days.

“Millie, there were days I couldn’t find my big boy pants. But your kindness to a total stranger made me realize that there is hope.”

I was deeply touched. I don’t remember the man but I’m glad the conversation went well. It could have gone really really bad and who knows where he would have ended up?

“I made so many calls that day and week and I couldn’t remember where I had spoken to you. Then I left that job and today wouldn’t you know it you answer the phone.”

I share this story because you just never ever know how you can lift someone. Who will you touch? Who may need your humor and cheerleading? Who may just be waiting for a life jacket to survive? This man apparently needed my craziness and silly advice that one day. As he continued sharing all that has transpired, including me telling him to write and create, he began to feel better about himself.

Darlings, life is too short not to share with strangers. It is also too long to wait for things to magically appear. Put on your big boy/girl pants and get out there and make the change. One step at a time. One person at a time. One conversation at a time. One love at a time. You get to choose this and it’s pure divine connection. I love you.

The Magic Healing Through Words

Since my sabbatical in November from social media something has been missing. Then came the holidays, a house full of people, and the return of another year. I still felt something was off. There is a sense of imbalance that keeps arriving when I wake to sit in meditation. A nameless sensation of emptiness that lingers. A knowing without destination. It’s bizarre and exhilarating simultaneously.

This morning I found it again waiting for me to respond to its calling. The stories have been piling up without true formulation. I just hold on to them with greed and selfishness…those of folks I’ve met that I want to savor on my own. But, they aren’t mine alone.

I gather words and stories from all walks of life. I tend to them while helping heal my own needs. And then I release them.

I want to hear your stories. I want your messages and snippets of your lives to be heard. I want to connect others to their purpose of what they desire. I crave to help pay forward love in whatever way I can….

How do we do this? How can we help one another?

We do it through groups and support. We do it sitting down and talking face to face. We do it by speaking and/or writing. We heal through connections. We begin to feel seen and heard. We feel acknowledged. We become engulfed by love and acceptance. That’s how we move through it all.

So thank you! For being here. Your words are always courageous. Your sharing is delightful. When you open yourself up you begin to heal me and you and others. Don’t ever stay silent about the things that move you, shake you, or teach you.

I love you.

Bless the World

A few years ago for Christmas a dear friend gifted me an amazing book by Mark Nepo: ‘The Book of Awakening.’ It’s a daily meditation guide. The pages are worn and marked. The book now looks like it’s been put through a dryer. Every time I pick it up I find something else that I’ve missed the last five years. Words have a way of popping out just when they need to be acknowledged.

“There are many reasons to be kind, but perhaps none is as compelling as the spiritual fact that it is what we do. It is how the inner organ of being keeps pumping. Spiders sting. Wolves howl. Ants build small hills that no one sees. And human beings lift each other, no matter the consequences. Even when other beings sting.”

Have we forgotten in these present times of “what we do?” Have we lost our way to understand that we are all on different spiritual paths and forms of evolving? Have we deviated from truth because of ideas, convictions and beliefs without once remembering that we must be kind to each other in order to make any form of transformation?

The hardest part of being an empath, or sensitive person, is the constant bombardment of others’ emotions. Even when I am not partaking in their issues, I feel the energy deep in the core of me. I am made to be kind. You are made for kindness. We cannot deviate from our authenticity. This is who we are. We learn how not to be kind, consciously or unintentionally… because we are born with love and kindness in our cells. That’s the starting point to each of us. That’s who we are. That’s what we come here to express to others. That is the web and fabric of our Unity.

Let’s try to return to THAT. Let’s…please…because the alternative really really really sucks! Tonight I am sending prayers to several folks really struggling in so many ways. I want to truly be present with them in spirit, in love, and in kindness.

I love you.

Be Soft with You

Be soft with your spirit. Be gentle with your essence. BE authentic to your purpose and calling. Rid yourself from the negative self-talk. You become everything you say that you are or that you are not. We are born every day, every minute, every second. We are here on borrowed time. Make it lovingly serene with your heart so that you can present your soul lovingly to another. This struggle is all bullshit at the end of the day. It doesn’t matter what you did or haven’t done. This moment, wasted reading this, or contemplating what hasn’t been scratched off your To Do List, is all irrelevant.

Really…this is nonsense. All the fake-ness of pretending and showing others a different person in order to fit in society. I want to know YOU…the real you that cries in your car, gets giddy at the first dog you see in the street…the YOU that loves the moon and stars.

There are folks losing their jobs, their homes, and families. There are others sitting alone in a hospital room watching a loved one fight for their lives. While some others are in the petty claws of political and religious arguments on social media…life is happening out there. Life is happening in here. Life is a series of ongoing movements and motions reminding us that we get to pick the perception and reaction.

I don’t know why bad things happen. I don’t know why anything happens. I would like to believe it’s for the evolution of our higher self. I would like to believe it’s part of a larger design. Who truly knows at this point? I have to be led by faith and that onset programming of a higher body of spirit guiding me.

What I do know is that we need one another. We need a tribe. We need love. YES…lots of love and to turn on our hearts to accept and spread it.

We need to know that we aren’t alone in the path of obstacles and challenges. We need to get out of our own head space and truly feel the vibration of another who is part of the overall conscious mass and start shifting towards changing the negatives to positives.

Hold a friend’s hand in need. Hug your lover as if it was the last time. Kiss those kids tightly. Smile at a stranger. Open doors for an elderly person. Compliment a cashier. Delete the toxic folks out of your life. If they don’t raise you then they have taught you something. It’s time to move on. Use your energy wisely. Just get out of your freaking head and lovingly give to another who needs to feel that the illusion of loneliness is not drowning their existence. It matters. It all matters to that one human who is struggling with life.

Stop the craziness of self doubt and anxiety because there is no way you leave this life alive. STOP focusing on the lack of anything and start creating by living in joy. So…live for yourself with honor, love, and compassion. You don’t own this blue planet alone. I am here. You are here. Let’s be here together in peace and harmony. Let’s be raised by love and light. We got this! ~m.a.p.

Love Notes to Humanity

Yesterday, before my boys left, we stopped at Barnes & Noble. It was crowded with the remains of Holiday folks. I waited by the magazines while the boys looked for their books. I remembered years ago when I moved to Asheville how that store was my saving grace. When the winter hit hard that year I was stuck up on the mountain and my only outlet was to come into town to the bookstore. I had been stripped of all monetary means. A friend and I bought an old motel that took everything I had. She went off to work for the winter and I was left with two teenagers and a deep isolation that pushed my soul into a spiritual awakening.

The mountain taught me invaluable lessons. The motel endorsed those experiences. At the time I didn’t recognize how priceless those obstacles would become. I learned to trust my intuition. I was snowed in more than I could ever imagined. I spent time without electricity and water. And I knew not one soul.

My outlet was coming into town once a week if I could make it down the roads. I packed a bunch of Post It notes and typed up letters. I would sit in a hidden corner of the store and write inspirational notes to put in books and magazines. In the mental health books I would leave “You are magnificent. You are here to make the world brighter.” In the glamour magazines, especially those for teenagers, I would leave something along the lines of “You are more beautiful than any photo shopped girl here. You are here to make a world a better place.” And on and on I would go around and just post the little love notes around the store. It filled me up with joy.

The letters I called, “Love Note from the Universe” I would fold and place in the windshield of cars in the parking lot. Those were longer. And deeper. I would watch from the second floor of the store as people would grab them. Some would open them up and read them, always checking around to see if they saw anyone. Many times they were thrown on the grown or crumbled up in their car.

I had the time to do these things. I have lost my way with busyness the last few years working full time, raising small children, taking care of lives (especially mine). They aren’t excuses. It’s just the way it’s been. It’s a different journey now, but yesterday I ached to start again doing those things that touched the core of me: going to the homeless shelter and having coffee; taking books to the VA Hospital; gathering stories from all walks of life. I ached for a moment so deeply for those simple acts of kindness that my chest felt like it cracked open. I gasped for a bit of air and recognized my soul’s call. I know it well!

This new year I plan on being more present with humanity. I vow to write Love Notes to Humanity and share all the stories from around my world. We are united by the act of connections, feeling acknowledged, listening, and knowing we are not alone on this journey.

The other day I was getting in my car from the supermarket. It was drizzling. An elderly couple was in front of my car. He held the umbrella and was trying to get his partner into the car. It was sweet to witness. I wondered at that moment how many years they had been together. He actually kissed the top of her fragile hand when she got in and closed her door, getting a bit wet then slowly dragging his feet to come around to the driver’s side. And without words, their story became mine. Love Notes for Humanity. Their actions became the driven force to go home and be gentler, more loving, and accepting of whatever was to come with all the buzzing from the holidays. A few times this week I have returned to that elderly couple in my memories. I smile thinking of their lives. And I am blessed to have them now become part of mine.

You are part of mine by just being here. Never, for one moment, do I take that for granted. I love you. May you also begin to collect and create love notes in your life from all of humanity. We need more of that!