Declutter Your Life

About a year and a half ago I had lunch with a wonderful author in Asheville. He was staying in the area for a month and luckily we were able to meet. I have loved and admired him for a very long time on social media. Sitting across from him I told him that his book shifted my perspective immensely.

He asked, “How so?”

I shared that the underwear chapter was a big AHA moment. To which he laughed. (I am sure he thought I was nuts but he appreciated my candor).

In this chapter he wrote that as he was sitting that day to write, his underwear bothered him. He realized he had allowed so many things in his life to bother him. Underwear shouldn’t be one of them. (I am paraphrasing). So he wrote that he stopped the process of writing, went and took off his underwear and threw them out.

I read that chapter and closed the book. I felt like someone had given me permission to release things that didn’t feel good on my body. I got up and went through my drawers. I threw away a lot of underwear and bras. Then I tackled my closet. Anything that didn’t feel good was going out. I must’ve spent a week going through all my things asking myself if it felt good. A bunch of jewelry, towels, sheets, you name it. I had already begun the process of releasing toxicity out of my life. This was just another level.

A few days later I was in the kitchen getting my mug for coffee when I realized I had too many I didn’t like. I have a thing about coffee mugs. I like them big and wide and able to not be super hot when I put them in the microwave. I hadn’t realized how many I owned that didn’t fit that category. I began to see the way I allowed so many things around me to dictate how I felt. Everything is an extension of us.

So, here I was sitting in front of this delicious soul (while he giggled) sharing about the underwear chapter.

He said, “Life is too short to be wearing underwear that crawls up your ass!”

The reality is that life is too short to be putting up with things, experiences, people, and places that make us uncomfortable. Anything that displeases us needs a resolution. And, unfortunately sometimes you need permission to see that it is okay to purge. I know I did! I got it from a book and a man I had no idea I would be meeting in person some day.

It’s a new chapter, beginning and year. What is holding you hostage with discomfort? Get rid of it. If it is crawling up your ass (figuratively or literally) let it go. We ain’t got time for that!

I love you,


Letting go of attachments

divine truth

When my second son was born a very talented cousin made him a baby quilt. As Patrick began to walk that “blankie” went with him everywhere. It played in playgrounds, the beach, watched movies in theaters, and took long rides in the car. It was washed every other day. He and his blanket were inseparable until one day. On a sunny Florida Saturday afternoon when he was four, Patrick took his treasured security to the swings in our backyard. He came in for lunch and the blanket was used as a tug of war by our two dogs. When he realized what had happened it was too late. The blanket was shredded into pieces. He went into heartbreak. He broke like I had never seen him.

I held him in my arms as he sobbed, his heart bleeding into mine with loss and sorrow. He couldn’t believe that his blankie was gone. How would he sleep at night? What would protect him? Within his questions I kissed his head and rocked him. I told him that “things” didn’t protect us. The faith he had in his blanket and companionship could be replaced by allowing God to protect him. At that moment he looked up at me. His eyes swollen from so many tears and he said that he couldn’t live without his blanket. We sat up and talked for an hour about possibilities, the heavens and faith.

As a mother I have witnessed so many of these heart wrenching moments of desperation. I told him that I didn’t have a blanket and that I was safe. I would put a huge bubble around me every day and around him and his brother. Both my boys were wiser than their young years. It wasn’t hard for him to understand the concept of letting go of attachments.

That night when I tucked him into bed, he placed his thumb in his mouth and rubbed the end of his shirt since his blanket was no longer there. He removed the thumb when he saw me and said, “Mommy, I don’t need my blankie. I have God protecting me now. I am putting blue bubble gum around me.” From that moment on my sweet son has been the minimalist in the family. That young man now, in his mid-twenties, has no love for things. He follows experiences rather than accumulate the materialism. He lives in complete simplicity.

How many of us have security blankets that we won’t let go? How many of us fill our homes and lives with stuff that occupies space but doesn’t do anything but clutter and weigh us down? In order to find divine truth and peace there has to be less of these things. Stuff is just stuff. The importance that we give it is as valuable as believing in divinity. Wrap yourself in assurance that less is more. God bless you!