The Victim Mode

As humans we aren’t exempt from brokenness and deep wounds. It’s how the light gets in. I don’t believe we are victims. The victim mind isn’t one I associate myself with at all…anymore. Every act leads to a reaction which follows by growth.

Some folks stay in victim/martyr mode. It works for them because they get attention. They get what they need. I used to be led by my circumstances, telling and retelling of stories that no longer served me. I don’t know how or why, but a part of me needed to be acknowledged for those experiences.

When traumas come up, whether through dreams or real life, I sit with them. I now recognize them. I also send them off their way. I visit for as long as they need attention. Those events and obstacles happened to get where I am now. Had I not experienced them I wouldn’t be who I am today. That may be a good or bad thing. It doesn’t matter. It’s still part of the formation of my human ego/personality.

I choose not to live in those crevices or soft reminders. I choose to rise and keep learning. I choose to forgive myself (and whoever else) for the participation. I choose to thank God (and them) for the amazing roles. This doesn’t mean the act is ignored. It doesn’t mean it never happened. It only means that I am not a victim of my past. I am also not a survivor. I am a human being on a journey of self-empowerment. I choose to stay in this excursion through love. I choose love over anything else.  When those memories, dreams, or events re-appear I now have the ability to detach from the pain and look at them as blessings. Every step, corner, edge, and mishap molded me in just the perfect way to open me consciously.

You and I have the capacity for greatness. The only way to move forward is to accept, detect and reject the things that have happened.  If you are living in regrets and resentments you aren’t ready to move into the next level of greatness. You are still in victim mode. If you keep blaming others for who and what you’ve become, you are still in martyr and victim mode. You are the only one who can change that role. Stop giving the pen for others to write YOUR story. Stop being ashamed of what brought you here. Stop allowing the past to dictate your present and future.  Every fear and disappointment adds to the level of your health. Do you want to be sick or do you want to be free? Forgive and let go. Don’t keep holding on to things that cannot be changed. 
 
Get out there and recognize your worth. Every single moment gives you an opportunity to do better, be better, and create better for yourself. No one is a victim. Traumas are part of the darkness that gives duality to our world. Without those experiences we would never know how amazing things can be. There is a balance available to us at all times. Choose love. Choose the ultimate love for yourself and move out of those old beliefs, undeserving paradigms and stay in the highest frequency of all.  
It isn’t enough that I let go of my own past. It requires the collective to do the same so we can shift the consciousness around the world. We are coming into some incredibly delicious times. Join me in healing. We can do it together.
 
I love you.
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You Are Divine

There are millions of stories out in the world that reflect right back to our own circumstances. Let’s face it, we all have them because that’s what makes life. We are compilations of historical events. Some monumental, others not so much. We are the sum of every single experience, interaction, and reaction. We are here on borrowed time creating novels of information and adventures.

Tell me what life doesn’t have some juicy substance that makes us gasp, smile, cry, love and forgive.

Tell me how we make it out of here without any experience that is worth sharing and learning from others.

Tell me, and show me as well, how you can do it alone because I don’t know if I would want to. I want to hear you, touch you, or have the availability to read parts of your legacy.

Tell me how we can overcome obstacles without truly being aided by a Supreme Being and loved ones.

Tell me, just tell me how we can withhold truth from ourselves and others…and still make it an authentic life. How can we call that a life worth living?

Tell me, because I don’t know any other way but to pour out my heart to others and allow others to pour their essence into me so I can drink from their knowledge.

I want to join the warriors of love and light to continue changing the world with spiritual vibes. I want to leave a footprint alongside others bringing joy and laughter.

This, I know, I want for the rest of my life.

Remember that every single thing you’ve experienced (bad or good, lovely or shameful) has brought you to this very moment. You get to decide what you do with your history to change your present and future self. Don’t ever forget your power and strength to create the best possible life.

Mucho love!

m.a.p.

Expansion of Consciousness

I am grateful. Every cell in my body feels the honor and privilege of being here. I have a charming life. Even when there are obstacles and challenges I know I have a wonderful life.

I have a sweet meditation room. It’s a large closet in our new house that I converted into my sacred space. It’s a portal of sorts. Every time I sit to meditate I leave through its openings. I go off into other worlds. When I return to my body I recognize the gift that my life is. I become even more grateful. I make my daily intentions before getting up from the floor, right when I am blowing out my candles.

“Make me an instrument of your love, God. Show me how I need to serve….”

This morning was no exemption at 4am. The worlds opened up for me. I saw the universe. I visited the deep places in my consciousness that allow for healing work through me and out into the world. It’s magnificent.

It’s magical and mystical and…oh…so very yummilicious.

I work in the mental health profession and if folks hear me express all the “visions” I have I might be institutionalized. Because…we are a race consumed by fear. We must label everything. We must make sense of what we aren’t accustomed to experience ourselves.

I cannot help anyone if I don’t help myself with love. I cannot hear, feel, or touch the heart of another if I don’t live it through me.

For decades I went around like a lunatic trying to fix everyone. I needed to have focused on me first. When I finally dealt with my own darkness I was able to help light others.

Compassion is a gene that needs to be expanded at all times. It always starts with our own healing. It’s a light always available to shine all around us. It’s in the smallest of acts.

That’s why I wake at the hour that I do daily and go off into my other realms. I am a better spiritual being navigating this human experience.

Sending out abundance of love into the world today. I feel you. I love you.

Sacred Expansion

I’ve come into my own silence, sacredness, expansion. I’ve visited with those things that required attention and I kept locking them in a chest. I’ve dealt with them one soul consultation at a time making sure to find closure. During meditation I’ve allowed the locked chest to open and I have visited with each fear and past event.

This is what I’ve done since I got off social media (Facebook and Instagram) two weeks ago. Plus I’ve read several amazing books. I’ve caught up with friends. I’ve taken time to be without chit chat or worries. I’ve come into my own space of love.

I’ve lived without interruptions. I’ve noticed how much more time I’ve accumulated.

It’s bizarre to acknowledge that I have been distracted by everyone else’s life so profoundly while disregarding mine. Meanwhile, I’ve navigated one of the busiest years in a decade. One that has brought sweet surprises while gaining a tremendous respect for my faith in humanity.

Magic…is all I can say. It’s been a magical experience.

My writing feels deeper too. My voice is not constricted. I am able to say and feel and share for me. Because when I write it is a channeling of sorts from my spirit to my humanness. The spiritual aspects of my incarnation sit with the human aspects and shared I’ve come into my own silence, sacredness, expansion. I’ve visited with those things that required attention and I kept locking them in a chest. I’ve dealt with them one soul consultation at a time making sure to find closure. During meditation I’ve allowed the chest to open and I have visited with each fear and past event.

Taking time for me and my family is imperative. It’s in the small acts. Nothing big. My life has not changed drastically by not being on social media. It’s just relaxed. I don’t pick up the phone in the middle of the night to read about others. I lay there and listen to the silence. I force myself to sleep again. I reach over to my husband for warmth. During the day I don’t impulsively check to see what’s happening, who can I help, what can I do? My concerns and interests consist of my own life and those in my inner circle.

This was the 80’s and 90’s. This is how I remember my younger years before internet. And, yes we are connected on a grand scale, able to touch millions. But we are also slaved to that connection, addicted to news and changes.

It’s truly a love-hate relationship for me. As a writer it is a conundrum. The world doesn’t stop because I am not available. It’s lovely to feel it. Life doesn’t cease to exist because I don’t participate in every conversation or answer every message or return every call.

All of it can wait till I return next year. Whenever I do return to the chaotic world of social media I can quickly shut it off. With each passing week I am aware of the massive peace my empathetic body feels. This is my Christmas gift to myself. And detaching is absolutely mystical.

Slow down, darlings! Be present in your life and with your loved ones. Everything else can wait. You don’t have to participate in every single thing every day. Allow the holidays to be a time of gentleness, love and awareness. Give attention to you.

I love you.

Just this Moment

There is an easy flow to this morning. The schools do not open till later due to the ice and cold weather. By this time I’m at work but today I sit across a playpen with a little boy eating his cereal and a little girl snuggled on the sofa watching her favorite cartoon. I never imagine my life at fifty like this.

I actually never imagined my life at fifty…at all. I didn’t think I would be here by then.

We have little deaths in our timelines. We get sick or completely reinvent ourselves. We move or stay or just wake up one day feeling different. It’s all magical and exactly how we intend it to become.

A million contracts are paid in our lives. Those contracts we designed before even incarnating. The lessons were created to expand our consciousness. The journey is up to us.

We hold the wheel. We maneuver ourselves to the next destination, watching carefully for mud slides or cracks on the road. The older we get the more aware we become…at least I hope that for everyone.

So this morning, all plans are out the door. I need to go see clients. They will wait for later. I need to be at a meeting which may be done through conference call. Everything is interchangeable, relatable and temporary. Right now I am exactly where I’m suppose to be.

I’m here watching the light hit the trees out back. I am watching the frost swirl with the wind in the porch. I am snuggled by one cat and another walking around wondering why we are still home.

The simplicity of life is in these moments. Things can change in an instance. And it’s okay. We breathe through it. We become grateful to the present. We are gifted these moments to take in what’s important and release what is not.

Right now it is me and my kiddos holding on to a few hours of free time.

Divine in You

The day will come when you won’t be looking for faith outside of you. When you stop looking for God in temples and religion. You will notice the Divine staring back from the reflection in the mirror. You will see it smiling at you in a homeless person or a loved one taking his last breath. You will find Source in your children as they laugh out loud. You will feel spirit in the kiss from your mate. You will finally recognize our connections and how important it is to be kind and compassionate to everyone. Even when they don’t accept it. You will find the silence and ability to walk away. This will be when you have reach the loving understanding of your purpose through unconditional love. I see you. I feel you. I know the God in you. And in me. I love you.

Prayers

I came out of a soft meditation re-entering this world with complete openness and vulnerability. I opened my eyes to the candles in front, engulfed by the darkness of early morning. It’s sacred time. My favorite time of the day.

I moved my hand towards my chest patting the soft thump of movement. Deep breaths. Deep awareness.

I hear the world at 3am. It’s quite different than any other time. It’s magical. The sounds from earth are therapeutic and of higher vibration. In that silence you can feel the connection of everything. You and I are not separate.

I bow my head in gratitude. A new day has arrived. I will do my best to help. I don’t know how it will show up. I don’t know who I will serve with love and kindness. It’s my job to just show up.

I’m here. Sending healing to all the areas that are fractured or hurting. I’m here to help shift the conscious mayhem of social fear. I’m here to help love you even if you don’t feel lovable. You are magnificent. I will keep reminding you.

I’m just here. With you. Together. In love!

(This meme reminds me of how sensitive we are when we allow ourselves to feel everything outside of us).