Laughter Heals

I visit my 85 year old. He’s having lunch with three other men. I grab a chair and sit next to him and a sweet gentleman name Walter.

My client asks, “Why are you here to see me? I know you’ve told me but I can’t remember!”

I make something up about being part of a welcoming committee making sure they are well taken care of at the facility. (This way he doesn’t start to question why he needs a guardian).

My client: “Does a woman like you have a husband?”

Walter breaks his silence, “uh oh!”

I ask, “A woman like me?”

My client: “A woman galavanting to see elderly men. What kind of man lets his wife do this?” He is smiling. I am laughing.

“My husband is at home with our kid….”

He interrupts and says, “If you were my wife I wouldn’t let you out of my sight!”

Walter says, “And that’s why she’s not with you!”

I laugh loudly. So loud that the place goes quiet. All those falling asleep over their plates are woken up. The table starts to rattle with laughter.

Laughter fills the crevices. My client starts to truly show me his sense of humor. I tell him that he’s my favorite. He smiles and says, “I bet you tell everyone that!”

Walter looks at me and says, “I hope one day I can become one of your favorites.” He doesn’t know it but today he has been bumped up to the top of the list. And we just met.

Folks…go make laughter. Go share your joy. It’s freaking contagious. I had me a ball sitting at that table with four lovely elderly men who don’t speak to each other. They gifted me with generosity and I amped up their reason for needing a nap when I left. They used all their reserved energy to laugh. Pure bliss!

Retrospective Observation from a Retreat

Twenty women from 20 to 82 years young shared space for 3 days. Not one single discord or negative exchanged was witnessed. Every single woman is from different background and faith, yet not once did I witness judgment or criticism for anyone sharing their feelings. We all laughed in the same language. We all embraced our differences. I am always blessed to be among such gorgeousness and tribe.

Amazing women have shared and entertained. We have touched upon all kinds of subjects, played games and truly loved. We have put our guards down. It’s been one of the most magical times in a while. The cackling of joy has been overwhelmingly silly and therapeutic. Omgosh!

It was a true no-judgment zone full of kindness and mutual ongoing respect.

Hospitality is not about entertaining. Hospitality is an attitude of opening up your life so others can come in and join. It is about allowing love and kindness to flow through that space of sharing and being in the present moment with company. And when this happens it is magical! I enjoy each one who shared that space with me at the Charleston Laughfest Retreat.

I walked miles of that beach with and without company. We shared with each meal and games. Everyone of those ladies took something magical home with them. And I took their friendships to a deeper level.

I am blessed to have been in a sacred space of love and compassion. Everyone needs that. It recharges the batteries. A weekend full of laughter is healing and therapeutic to the oomph degree.

If you don’t have a tribe please do make one, join one, or just reach out to me. I can help with that. I’m sure we can build one together.

I love you.

Don’t Waste a Day without Laughter 


The other day I went into Starbucks. The young woman on the other side of the counter was mesmerized with the long strands of sparkles in my hair. I motioned her to come closer to whisper. She met me half way across the counter. “These are strands of fairy hairs. Someone has a job of cutting the hair from fairies and we get to put them in our on heads. It gives me magical powers.” She didn’t know what to make of that. So she backed away smiling and nodded. “Really?” she asked. I went on to tell her something really far-off and silly. She began to shine like the strands of sparkles in my hair. 
I placed the order. She asked me for a name. I told her “Giggles.” She started to giggle. “Of course it is!” shaking her head, showing me her beautiful teeth, throwing her head back and trying to compose herself for the next customer.

I went to the end of the counter. The drink was made and the barista yelled, “Chai latte for Giggles.” The place started to giggle. See that’s the thing about laughter, it’s freaking contagious. Who said I can’t be Giggles one day? I’ve been Fairy, Sparkles, Bubbles, Babbles, Twinkle and Dazzle. Each time the name gets yelled out and someone takes a look at a middle-aged woman giggling her way to the counter, there are looks of joy (or criticism). But, there is always a chorus of silliness.

Bring on the joy through the simplest of things. You can be anything you want. Stop taking yourself so serious. You are NOT gonna leave here alive so have a heck of a lot of fun along the way. Be whatever you want to be. Make another laugh, it heals. Make them feel happy. You might just be the perfect energetic chord that attaches and lifts their spirits. ~m.a.p.

The Life in You

lovers in a cafe

When the waiter comes
to our table
does he witness a woman
immersed in love
or a couple enthralled
in the hallucinations
of lust and desire?
Under the sunlight,
sunglasses hiding my truth,
I wish you could see what
I see in you
as I smile and laugh at
all the goofiness
that brings me joy.
The life in you transports
sonnets, music, and art
right to my inner core.
I wish I could reflect your spirit,
gathering the kindness,
gentleness, and humility
but I think you wouldn’t
believe what you see.
I sit under open sky,
on a quaint terrace,
eating my salad
giggling like a school girl
waiting to finish
so I can steal one more kiss
to last me many moments
until I see you again.

Core Essence

This morning’s goodbye

tugged and pulled

like never before

as I tattooed a kiss

on your neck

inhaling your smell

while your eyes searched,

smiling,

reaching,

that place of home

no one else has before.

Twenty-five years of this

is wearing us down

to break the restrictions

we created for safety:

the not-falling-in-love clause;

the no-questions-asked rule;

the only-a-few-days-at-a-time mantra;

the take-in-for-what-it-is precious moments.

This week was different

and you asked;

I replied.

You went there;

I returned holding your hand.

I expect nothing;

you anticipate even less.

But,

somewhere in the in-between

the words

“I will miss you”

echoed from both our lips

and that’s

worth a priceless fortune

to the essence of

our soul union

in this new era….

What Do You Want To Do With Your Life?

 

follow-your-dreams

I was at a women’s retreat two weekends ago and most of the ladies there are following their soul’s purpose. From an herbalist, acupuncturist, massage therapist, reflexologist, Reiki master, sound therapist, and other modalities, these women are on their loving paths. They have followed their dreams and passions. It was a bit intimidating to sit among them and still not know what the heck I am suppose to be doing. My identity was tied to the motel/retreat center for over five years. Before that, it was tied to the business world of industrial parts distribution. And, now, here I am in the second part of my life and I haven’t a clue what I am suppose to do with my life.

Here’s the delicious thing about not knowing what to do: others have no problem letting you know what you should be doing because they see your strengths in places you can’t recognize. So, I made my rounds with these magnificent women asking for help. I would ask, “What should I be doing? I feel so lost in my professional path.” They all had one good suggestion after another…most of which I didn’t really want to do. They didn’t feel right, even though they sounded so yummy. Then a sweet lady said to me, “You are a fairyologist! Oh my God, what more do you want to do?” I had to laugh out loud until I almost peed in my pants. Seriously? She was actually serious about this. This fairyologist title was an endearing label that came as a joke from my husband back in April for my birthday. He paid for a fairyology online class. I passed it and Bang…I became a fairyologist. It’s a funny story. It’s not a profession. Yes, I talk to fairies, rocks, trees, and anyone who will listen to my excessive jabber. That doesn’t make me a professional in something. It just heightens my eccentricities out to the world to witness and poke fun at.

I looked at this woman who is a professional and had to seriously question her insight. Then I chugged the entire conversation and asked her again what she thought a fairyologist does for a living? She hadn’t a clue. That ended that series of thought-provoking-life-changing Q&A’s.

I think about the many folks who have asked me these type of questions: “What should I be doing with my life? What’s my purpose? Should I go back to school? Should I move and start over somewhere else…?” When I had the retreat center those were some of the many intriguing questions. Everyone is looking for answers. And I would always give them the same response: “What do you feel like doing? What makes your soul come alive?” Most folks would honestly answer, “I really don’t know.”

But we DO KNOW. We are just afraid to tap on that source and be led by it…until we are brave enough to entertain the idea without feeling guilty over the million responsibilities we have in our lives. Unfortunately, we’ve been taught in this society to put everyone first before our own dreams.

And right now that’s my own answer. What I feel like doing is traveling, meeting folks all over the place, and writing about them everyday. Sort of like the Humans in New York blog. I want to write about people from all walks of life because we learn from each other. I want to be present in their presence. I want to share stories that pull and push compassion, kindness and empathy out into the world. And, I want to get paid for doing it. (This is important because I have a little one who will be going with me on this trip and a husband).

“What would that look like? How would I start? What needs to be in place to get this dream in motion? How can I make money from the road doing what I love: talking to people, taking their pictures and sharing their stories?”

I haven’t a clue…yet! But I DO KNOW that it will show up soon.

I don’t do labels well. As in a previous blog post, I am not into titles. I have a hard time adjusting my fairy ass to one label. It isn’t who I am. I have a psychology degree and have worn many hats in this lifetime. I get asked who I am and what I do and I freeze like a possum playing dead. Seriously, it’s sad! I can never remember that I write, or that I have raised six children and redoing it for the seventh time. Like, my brain goes dead when someone asks me what I do. The question should be, “What haven’t you done thus far?” The list might be shorter and my brain may actually work with an answer. I have led a charming interesting and passionate life. I have done a lot of things that I don’t recognize as important but to me they were invaluable. And I thrive on doing more of what brings me pure ecstatic joy on a daily basis. If it makes me laugh, it’s even a larger dream come true.

But, for all of you who are on the same path of self-discovery, I urge you to dig deeper. Go to retreats and classes. Surround yourself with people you admire and see how the magic begins to unfold. It’s in sharing and exhaling with others that we find our authentic powers. Google the crap out of possibilities and spend time alone researching what feels good for your soul. There is no right or wrong answer. There is just an endless path of possibilities. Also, get rid of expectations. They serve nothing but disappointment. Just do it...like Nike suggests!

Have your gatherings. Have your reunions. Exchange information and recognize who you are and what feels good when you are among others. The right angel and person will show up. I have a meeting with Destiny soon in regards to my life’s work. This I know. I feel it. Until then…I am who I am making my way home just like you, paying my dues, and cleaning out old karmic debts. Have a blessed day!!!