Climb the Mountain

We move and make decisions based on experiences and our personal level of awareness. I cannot ask others to help me when they have not experienced the challenges. And believe me, everyone has an opinion the moment you make things public. During these times I marvel at the level of awareness in our society. Everyone starts to tell you how you need to live based on what they’ve experienced, what they’ve researched and whatever else feeds their perspective. People are moved through fear in most cases. They enter a loop of beliefs and cannot let them go. And then it’s transposed on to our human spirit. During challenging times this all gets magnified and sent out to the collective.

It can be destructive. And it can also be a positive outlet. It’s up to you to decide. Your higher self leads the way. It is your internal GPS. It knows truth. It begins to guide you to continue trekking.

Every mountain you choose to climb begins with small steps. If you go too fast you start to feel the unhealthy pressure and lack of breath. You allow fear to take over in that momentum. The tinnier the steps the more endurance you accumulate. It might take longer but to climb a high mountain you need to truly be mindful of your life substance… your breath. You have to continue the self pep talks. You must believe in yourself beyond anything else. You must listen to you and what you feel is truth.

Here is the world’s greatest opportunity to come from a place of love and compassion. To come from a place of trusting yourself. To allow the unknown to be just that while you work on yourself.

GO Climb your mountains. Regardless how others react. Go after your goals in spite of the naysayers. Take chances. Pick a path along the journey even when there are a million deviations. Believe whatever makes YOU happy. Keep climbing. Keep breathing. Keep focusing on what you want.

You get this giant pause to work on your life. It might feel like everything will never be the same. But neither are you.

Your life is a blessing made up of so many magical moments. Don’t allow anyone to instill their shit on you. Ever! You begin to create the life you desire the moment you put on those hiking boots and start walking towards your purpose. The higher your purpose the more people will try to pull you down. It’s all a game and you get to decide how you participate.

You can do anything you want. I promise. But start with your inner awareness and full heart belief. Love yourself enough to turn the impossible into possible.

Love is What Saves Us

My son and I were working outside in the yard yesterday evening. He’s axing away at a tree. I’m clearing a heavily dense area into what will be a secret garden. I’m tired and sweaty.

The silence breaks with him, “Mom, you are doing an amazing job with my sister’s kids. You are raising them to be loving and healthy children.”

“Baby, where is this coming from?” I asked because it took me by surprise.

“You have to wait for them to go to bed in order to come out here and work on what you love to do which is nature. You sacrifice a little bit of you to help them survive. They are constant. They don’t give you a chance to breathe during the day (he giggles). I know this is not what you had in mind at this time of your life when we were all gone….”

I interrupt and stop pulling at the earth. Breathing heavily, I sit on the ground next to him feeling defeated. “Nelson, I truly don’t think I’m doing the best job for them or for me. Your sister was hard because of all her mental issues. They have so much of her running through their blood. I’m not the same woman I was then or have the same amount of energy….”

“You are better.” He stops clearing the tree and sits next to me, “You are giving them life. They would be dead with her. You and Matt have created a foundation and loving home. And you always say that love is all we need. They are a LOT. I admit that it’s overwhelming at times but they truly love you so much. They are smart and they are constantly challenging you and the world around them.”

He hugs me. I shed a few tears. Mostly of gratitude for recognition.

That was the pause needed to just finish for the day. It was getting dark. My body ached but I felt great to have done so much with his help in a couple of hours.

This second act at mothering children is different. It’s conscious parenting. It’s a lot harder than before. It’s also a lot easier than before. These children are thriving and I have zero expectations for them except that they feel loved. I’m trusting they continue to find the magic in the world and give love to it.

And that they are.

When my 31 year old recognizes the journey it does make it special. He’s been here five weeks…the longest time he’s spent with them. We spoke a bit more. He was kind and loving and full of insight. The adult in him acknowledges the adult in me.

Walking back to the house the earth seemed to sink us into it with gratitude for tending to her on Earth Day. At that moment I thanked the greatest mother of all…Gaia…and all the lessons she teaches me.

You Perceive Through Experiences

Yesterday in the kitchen my oldest son shared a few messages from his friends for me. Then we got into an in-depth conversation that his friends (in their 30’s) are feeling blah. There is a funky lethargic energy. I told him that even with all this extra time people aren’t feeling motivated. He agreed. He said that this should be the time we should be really diving into artistic creativity, but it isn’t happening for many.

There is a sense of nothingness and uncertainty. People feel as if they are moving through Dooms Day. Others as if they are being controlled.

We can motivate and inspire a million times over but until this is over not many will feel it. It’s easier to be numbed out. The little bit that’s asked of us is a lot at times. Even as simple as staying put and social distancing. We are not made to isolate. And this is why so many folks are struggling.

Yet, there are those who are able to do and move through this. We are being asked to sit with the unknown and trust. We are being told one thing and experiencing others.

Follow your knowing. I don’t care how many people tell you to look at things their way, if it doesn’t resonate you do not have to follow it. You are your best judge of character.

Stay safe. Stay in your truth. If you are motivated…yay. If you are not… yay. Your soul knows what it needs. Be gentle with yourself.

A New World

I slept very little last night. I tossed and turned. I would take a short nap to wake to this new reality.

This is a massive new experience that is shaking up the world. It feels like a wicked sci-fi movie. But this reality is transforming us all. It is elevating awareness and consciousness like never before. It is transforming us to live in the precious moments.

I watched a video from Madrid, Spain. A doctor shared, while sobbing, their reality that because of the lack of ventilators they are letting those older than 65 years die so the ventilators can go to the younger population.

So I cried along with him as the video shared the doctor’s plea for government aid. Another female doctor expressed her anger and frustration. These folks are dying alone. Nurses are the only ones able to hold their hands as they go through the agony of dying.

It’s happening across the globe.

This virus is not just taking out the weakest link. It’s taking us to a place of destitution. We are asking about our purpose here. We are questioning the why’s and how’s. It is unmasking humanity and we are all feeling it. All of it! Part of the collective is mourning. The other half is waiting for something powerful to happen.

One moment I am stricken by the anxiety of the unknown. On another moment I am excited to see a new world emerge from the fire. There are so many facets to all of this. And I refuse to allow fear dictate my days. But there are still those moments I will look at my children and hold tears back. We will never be here again.

This event is showing us how to work together to stay alive by not being together. It’s opening us greatly to compassion and love from afar. And we are finally recognizing that we are connected. What happens over there also happens over here. What happens to you affects those around us. We can’t do this without the collective participation.

Healthcare workers have become heroes beyond any other type of groups before. They are in the front lines witnessing death on a daily basis.

The only way to contain this is to please stay away from others. My heart aches for the elderly population which happens to be one of the most precious group of humanity. They brought us here. They are our historians. They are our ancestors.

Be safe, darlings. Stay in your highest vibration. There is so much that will come out of this. I believe it. But until then please be mindful to keep us all safe. You are making a difference by your actions. And continue to raise each other instead of tearing each other apart.

Prayers for Clearing Fires

Three years ago the mountains around us burned. We didn’t know if we had to leave our home. Weeks of that intensity took a hold of us. The unknown was weighing right above us a few miles down the road. So now, watching the devastation in California and Australia I am again reminded of the frailty in life. The winds can shift in a single moment and life is forever changed.

Take nothing for granted.

I went into prayer last night so deeply that I left my body on my bed. Hours upon hours of flying over these places pouring sand and water all over the land.

I returned at 1:11am to the sound of our little boy crying. I smiled at the time. When I returned to our bed I was still in a state of jet lag. This happens often.

Let’s continue putting out fires. Let’s continue being compassionate. Let’s be humans with empathy and love.

Sending healing out today. Shifting consciousness is my goal…for me and others to recognize the innate and miracle power that lies within us. We are fire and water and wind and everything else.

I love you.

The Magic of Perspective

What we see and how we interpret it determines how we live our lives. We accept and understand from the level of our experiences. This is why we are all coming from different levels of awareness. The lens of intaking information and processing are always shifting.

Many years ago I took this picture of my husband as we were hiking. The picture captured a completely different perspective of what I was experiencing. Was my reality wrong? Was he entering a portal and I didn’t see it with my naked eyes? My eyes saw what I could understand which were leaves through a beautiful forest. There are so many different views to everything around us…at all times.

We capture everything around us, including conversations, based on examples of past similarities.

We have the capacity of truly being mindful even when we disagree. We can see things differently and still love one another.

Perspective is ever changing. You can heal your past by seeing with different lenses. Darlings, allow yourself the ability to shift and heal based on what you want in the future and not old programming. You get to decide how you see the world around you, how you process information and how you utilize it for your life.

Make it magical. Open your eyes and your heart to find the divine around you.

I love you.

Solar Eclipse of the Heart

Ohhhh today’s Solar Eclipse!!!

Remember the 80s song Total Eclipse of the Heart?

Yeah…that!

Are you feeling the expansion?

Sweats, heart racing, nasty headaches, nausea and some other body spasms? The last few days have been a programming of ups and downs full of lots of emotions. Heart blasting ones. Memories from the past have felt like an eclipse of time.

You aren’t going crazy. There are several retrogrades in the cosmos as well. It’s some yummy intense energy in the esoteric realm pushing awareness and waking the body up. It’s asking (actually it’s begging) us to pay attention and open ourselves to love and truth.

How do we grow? Through discomfort most of the time. It’s unfortunate but a true observation.

Allow for these discomforts to show up and move on. Don’t overdo it. Be gentle with your body. Be kind to your thoughts. Meditate. Be still but do something that brings you joy. Stop beating yourself up for what you’ve done or don’t do. It’s truly remarkable to be in your spiritual body and recognize that this is not real. You are a spectator of your movies and drama. Do not second guess yourself.

Now go hug your spirit. It’s working really really really hard this week trying to stay in this human chaos.

I love you. Love yourself as well. Have a blessed day.

Please Be Kind

Please be kind to one another. Be gentle with someone who is going through a tough time. No judgment or criticism is gonna make things better. You don’t know what’s going on in their lives. You might have made up your own story. The truth is that no one knows the heart and soul of another. We cannot imagine the mental anguish that goes on in life. Find love even when it’s impossible. Find compassion, especially when it seems improbable. We are all taking each other home. I will say it again and again, sounding ridiculous and redundant, “I love you!”

Be the love you want to see in the world. I fail…OFTEN. I fail and fall and fracture just like everyone else. I then have to check my ego and put it back in the place where it is of service for the important aspects of survival. We are here to learn and expand in a cosmic journey. So ego serves nothing when it comes to compassion and love. Have a safe and loving week. Give your heart to another who needs it. What a gift it is!

Integrity for Purchase

A coworker was sharing a story about someone. Another coworker said that it was “integrity for purchase.” This meaning that the person had integrity only when it was monetarily convenient to her.

I had one of those Aha Moments. Integrity for purchase isn’t just based on monetary or materialistic issues. Some folks just acquire integrity based on their needs. But, at the end of the day they are still lacking character, authenticity, principle and honor. They lack value and falsify it by acquiring what they need from others in a sneaky way.

These are narcissists, ego maniacs and highly selfish people. They can manipulate others for their needs. And those folks who are kind can often times find themselves in a horrible web of hurt and despair because of their behaviors.

It’s sickening. It’s destructive. It’s inhumane.

Integrity is a huge one for me. I observe folks by their actions and not by what they say. They can write lovely things and behave egotistically. They can look at you straight in the eyes and believe their own lies.

As I continue walking into a deepened spiritual journey I am always questioning my own integrity. I question my own egotism. And I hope I continue to question it because it keeps me in check.

I also tend to beat myself up for wrong-doings…. For cheating on my soul because I wanted something so badly and I knew (instinctively) that it wasn’t for me. This also keeps me grounded in checking my integrity. I am imperfect and do fall for those who promise what they will never give. They are amazing salesmen.

Darlings, please recognize the toxic energy associated with these types of personas. They are sick individuals who thrive on the kindness and compassion of higher frequencies. They believe they can get a great deal for what you easily project. Remember that your integrity is not for sale!