Life Cycles

We move through cycles of what was and what is. And, somewhere in between lies the illusion that these things make us whole and become our stories. Your story might be raw and full of pain, or it might consist of happiness and delightful moments. You have been embraced by love and lovers (past and present), but in the end it is this very second that glues us together. You have lost a loved one to death or just the ending of a relationship and it hurts like hell but you are still here surfing the ebb of deep waters.

This is Sacred Presence.

This is part of expansion.

This is a raw and vulnerable ability to stay here and share while connecting to another by saying, “I am here for you. You are not alone. I understand. I have experienced something similar. Or, I haven’t and it is beautiful how you are moving with grace, strength and faith.”

Yes, these are the moments that make us whole through the veil of life. These are the days that move through us in the subconscious with changes and growth. We don’t know it but there’s a shift inside. This new year is one full of growth and adventure. You have been tested for so long that you have forgotten what it is to just be in sacred presence.

We can’t look back and know when things changed and we gave up but they are there. Today I am making changes to a new opportunity to find joy in the little things. These non-judgmental days of self awareness are huge mile markers.

Today…Tomorrow…Every single morning is an opportunity for me to expand my heart and consciousness.

Are you ready as well?

Keep searching for your truth. It isn’t always pretty or perfect or without some hurt…but it is your truth. These are the things that have created your humanness to continue expanding in our world. The conscious shift in knowing and acceptance is evolving within you always. And how MARVELOUS you are, darling! Go be all that greatness you are meant to be!!!! Together we make some yummy magic. Mucho love.

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Happy 2020

Growth doesn’t happen quickly. It takes time. Expansion is slow and sometimes extremely messy. Spiritual growth forces you to see the parts of yourself that are dark and unattractive.

But…

Once it starts to unravel you begin to see the new you. Once you consciously SEE it things begin to make sense.

2019 was such a year for me. I am grateful for it all.

By the time October hit I was in shambles. I was depleted. I found myself during lunch times curled up in my car overlooking the mountains by work praying the year would just swallow me whole. I was done with it and the lessons. They were metaphysical lessons. They were emotional ones. They were all about ripping me apart to examine me. And it wasn’t pretty. Ughhh it was not nice to see myself going through the dark night of the soul without a lantern.

The last time I experienced such openness was in the end of 2010 when I moved to these mountains. And now I was coming full circle recognizing the all-ness and oneness of the lessons.

So as November began I felt a sense of relief. By the time December arrived I had truly found myself with much clarity about the things I desired. I saw ME.

2019 has been an incredibly tough teacher. 2020 will be all about finally BEing the person I have dreamed off becoming.

I pick two words for the year. I had picked “release and surrender” for 2019. What did I expect?

So for 2020 I have picked “adventure and joy.”

Make your intentions clear. Write them. Don’t let another day pass you by with dreams. Chase after them. I have spent years dreaming of writing and creating. This is my year to put it all out there with humanitarian causes.

Happy New Everything to you, darlings. You are not alone on this journey even if you feel that you are. Reach out please! I love you.

Gratitude and Blessings

On this week of gratitude may we come together in Spirit. I am always searching for the stories within the stories…in strangers and friends; in family and folks we meet daily. I Search for The Divine in simplicity. I feel it in a touch, a hug, a kiss…and an intimate glance across the room. I hear it in long belly laughs. I smell it in the sweetness of the earth. I taste it on so many levels when a loved one cooks for me.

I have faith in humanity. Don’t you? Don’t you see it on a daily basis in the miracles of life? Don’t you feel it in the shift of the collective as it evolves into love?

The day will come when you won’t be looking for faith and grace outside of you. It’s happening now. You aren’t looking for God in temples and religion. You notice the Divine staring back from the reflection in the mirror. You see it smiling at you in a homeless person or a loved one taking his last breath. You find Source in your children as they laugh out loud. You feel Spirit in the kiss from your mate. You finally recognize our connections and how important it is to be kind and compassionate to everyone. Even when they don’t accept it but on a higher level they are taking it in.

You find the silence and the ability to walk away from pain or walk towards the things you desire. This is how aware you are that you have reached the loving understanding of your purpose through unconditional love. This is how you’ve found you in the vastness of Spirit.

I give thanks for you. The blessing of you walking alongside me on this journey. Thank you.

I see you. I feel you. I know the God in you. And in me. I love you.

(The photo was taken this morning as I was writing this post).

November Full Moon

I wrote today. A lot. We had a snow day and the kids gathered around me playing, watching TV, while I ferociously got words out into pages of my journal. I don’t know how I could possibly have so much to say. But I did. Each line flowed into the next. Every so often I would put the journal down to feed them and stains of food would find way into pages. Signs of motherhood I guess.

And I wrote some more, on this full moon, creating and manifesting. I’ve asked with full intentions from my desires. I wrote until they took naps. Then I meditated. I lit my candles, burned my sage, and said my prayers.

There is magic getting dreams out in the open. There is mysticism that seems to align quicker when words or pictures are present.

Tonight take some time to manifest. This moon is powerful and directing us to find truth. It’s almost the end of a year. It’s been one of the hardest and most challenging for me in about a decade. It’s taught me more about myself than any other time. I’ve falling in love with so much that I never knew I wanted, and I’ve let go of so many other things that had me hostage.

Today I took a lot of time to cater to those things: the good and bad. It was a beautiful way to spend the day.

Sending love to all.

Intimacy

We are missing this. We are missing FROM this. We move through our days without physical connections while connecting to strangers in the screen. We are exhausted from our days, escaping into another world that might just get us. No matter how you slice it it is a form of intimacy. It is fulfillment for millions who fear rejection, avoidance and judgment.

But…when was the last time you spoke heart to heart with someone? Or allowed tears to fall in their presence? Or merely sat in silence holding their hands because words were too heavy to carry? How long has it been that you openly shared a heartfelt story, a wrenching shameful memory and just trusted because your soul needed it more than your ego?

The injustice we have created while living in fear of bigotry and shame separates us. Don’t you think?

There are so many different ways of connecting to others. Each act of kindness is a window into their intimate world. You never know how you will touch another emotionally and spiritually until you allow your own rawness to show.

So I will continue to pour my love to whoever I can. I don’t care if it’s accepted or rejected. Somewhere in between their walls and discomfort is a door that allows me to be in their Sacred intimate space of light.

Healing

If someone triggers you figure out what is that unhealed part of you that needs release. I get triggered by folks who are constantly judging and criticizing others. I had a mom who did it all day, every day. So when I am among others who are in full nasty judgment mode I shut down. I get angry. And guess what? I start to judge them. So what triggers me is the unhealed parts and I do it myself towards them.

Your job is to decipher what and who you keep in your life that make you feel good. Let go of those things and people who make you feel otherwise.

Let Go

Time always has a way of defining the truth: True friends, obstacles, situations, and whatever we think that right now will never get better. I have discovered that each passing moment grows in distance with how I perceive and what is real. That’s the thing about time. Today’s bumpy ride won’t be the last but it serves for a wonderful lesson in expansion. What’s important is the mutual love between friends, family and the strangers that help move us along the road. Hang on to that. Always hang on to knowing that you are not alone on this ride. Remember that distance from anything gives awareness of lessons. We are spiritual BEings having a very messy human existence that requires change. The constant flux of growth is part of the experiences. We navigate through love, acceptance and courage.