Tag: strangers

The Gift of Darkness

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I met Nikki in Starbucks this morning. She was three people behind me in the line. Once I ordered I walked towards her and whispered, “I’m sure you get this a lot but you are absolutely gorgeous.”

She looked into my eyes and told me she didn’t.

“What’s wrong with people?” I asked smiling.

“Thank you so much for that compliment.” Her eyes began to tear up. “I don’t feel well today.”

“Girl, you fake it well.” I asked her for a hug and she began to cry.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, sweetheart! It’s only one day. You fake it well. Actually that’s such shit, you know. That whole statement of faking it till you make it. It’s like stomping vulnerability in fear that the world will witness your humanity!”

She cried while nodding in agreement. I reached for her hands.

“Talk to me. Tell me what’s aching in that tender heart?”

She shared right there in line, after she placed her order. She let go briefly of something so harsh and it came out in small syllables. So we hugged. We connected. I told her it was one day. It was one month. It was just life but that came short of what truly aches in her. I will never know the entire story and I don’t care to. What I know is that she was hurting.

I felt the break. I kissed her cheek and told her I would send her loving light and prayers. She accepted them. And just like that it was over.

It only takes one second to smile or reach towards another. She needed that release. I happened to be the catalyst and it could have been anyone.

Mary Oliver’s line is always one I use to remind myself that in darkness there are gifts just as many as in light. It’s all how you show up and allow for the lessons to unfold. Don’t let one situation dictate your entire life. Life fluctuates between the dark and the light… and they are both encompass by love.

I love you,

Millie

We Get to Choose Our Focus

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(google image)

Something happens among strangers who aren’t trying to impress or move through egotism. There’s a mystical connection and awareness through a touch, a word, small conversation or a glance. Life simply exists without the expectation of fulfilling the other. Strangers dive into the rarest form of freedom and many times without filtering truth. At least this happens with me a lot and I dance in the union of such moments.

Not long ago I went to Goodwill to drop off stuff and decided to go in to get my daughter something for her computer. As I was kneeling in the electronic area I heard the most beautiful melodic male voice singing along to the store’s music. He was right behind me. Without getting up or turning around I said to him, behind me, “You have one of the loveliest voices I’ve ever heard!” I got up and looked at a gentleman in his late 60’s or early 70’s.

He kindly said, “Wow, thank you! When I was younger I sang all the time. I have had cancer three times and with it and the chemo my voice has disappeared.” He shared a glimpse to his story.

At that very moment I got closer to him, looked into the depth of his brown eyes and said, “You are a gift to still be standing here and singing with such hope. You are a miracle. How very awesome to walk near death but continue this journey of faith and humanity!”

The man smiled, began to tear up as I could witness he was having an Aha Moment. I could see his humanness and ego take a backseat. I could see in seconds through the glances that his wheels were turning reacting to memories, the journey, and events.

“I can’t tell you what your words have meant to me right now,” He began to speak as he composed his spirit. “I have rarely been grateful for anything, less this horrible disease until you just said this. Thank you!”

I smiled, touching his hand in mine, “Keep on singing! You touch others with that magical voice. You touched me.”

He hugged me and dropped the items from his hands on the shelf and left the store gathering his tears through his fingers. I felt horrible for a second but knew the message didn’t come from me. This message of gratitude was something the Divine needed to share with this man through sacredness. As I sat in my car I began to shed tears for my own gratitude. I, too, walk here in a journey of faith and hope.

This stranger’s spirit touched the core of me. I needed his song to move me just as much as he needed to hear words of encouragement. What a mystical union for us both! I am forever touched by strangers, their kindness, wisdom, laughter, smiles, and stories. We are all connected holding the earth up with love, stories, and hope.

With all the storms, fires, anger, sorrow, loss, and uncertainties we truly need to come together to remind each other of the simple things. We need to remember what is important. We need acknowledgment and honoring. I am appreciative for these Angels who come into my life daily to remind me of love and what’s important on this journey. We get to decide what we focus on every single day. Let’s make it magical!

I love you,

Millie

Green-eye Beauty

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I went to see a client at a facility today and bumped into this yummy little lady. She was in the next room. She was all packed up to leave. I asked her if she was okay. She said she was sad that she was leaving the rehab center. I kissed her hand and then left to see my client. On the way out she was still sitting by the hall so I got on my knees, to eye level, and asked her if she needed anything? She said she was not sure. We spoke a bit. She told me she is 79 years young. I noticed her gorgeous green eyes and told her they were beautiful. She is absolutely lovely. I kissed her cheeks and I left to a meeting at the facility. The entire time I was in the meeting I kept thinking of Judith. I could not get her out of my mind. So when I got out I went back to her room.

“What happened to you that landed you here?” I asked.

“I had a heart attack. I’ve had several. I’ve had other medical issues.” She answered softly and with complete clarity.

“What broke your heart?” She looked at me and gasped. I could see her breathing. I could see the sadness in all of her. “Judith, you do not owe me an explanation. I just want you to be aware that your heart attack is due to a major broken heart. I want you to know that I see you. I feel you. We might not cross paths again but I see you, darling.”

She began to shed tears. I held her in my arms as she softly let the sighs. I felt her heart break again and again a hundred times and the scars resurface. Then I whispered in her ear that she was loved…that all her heart break has allowed for divine light to come in and fill it with hope and faith.

I’ve been hugged a lot in this lifetime…today Judith embraced me in a way that I felt my heart open up and swallow her whole. I felt the oneness of all the frailties in the world in that hug. I felt the deepest despair and the largest connection of gratitude.

Today, this green-eye beauty allowed me to witness vulnerability on a different level: the marriage of love and surrender. My heart feels it immensely. ~m.a.p.

Entertaining Strangers

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I’ve had the amazing pleasure of entertaining angels and guides dressed as humans. I’ve had teachers show me mystical lessons and practical ways of navigating in this life. I’ve met folks going through divorces, losing their spouses, and entering into marriages that have echoed my own past experiences. I’ve seen bravery, strengths and remarkable comebacks from illnesses. I have experienced some incredible phenomenons that aren’t logical and have had aha moments by the thousands. On rare occasions I’ve experienced the tiny percentage of ugliness, complaints, and stress beyond words. When I encounter folks I truly feel their presence (or lack of).

Stories come in all shapes and sizes. When I sit with someone I am always deeply surprised at how folks are truly vulnerable in nature. I am aware that it isn’t my business to fix anyone or make them fully happy. Some people receive what they reflect and everything around them seems to be a ticking explosive mechanism. Others are freaking yummilicious and being in their space makes me feel so much better. One of the most priceless lessons has been that I am not responsible for anyone else’s happiness. I am not a fairy godmother or a Genie. I am here on this earth to serve as an ear and love. I am here to share sacred space with others without judgment while providing love.

I have heard stories, exchanged tears, and had full belly laughs with countless of souls. Usually in the most unpredictable places. I was fortunate to also own a motel/retreat center that allowed for those stories in the past.

Overall it has been a journey of a thousand experiences. Each person who has entered my life has left a piece of their spirit with me.

Thank you for all the friendships and encounters, here and in real life. I love you. You continue to inspire me every single day.

Your Loss is Felt

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We went to Yorktown in Charleston, South Carolina. My husband loves the Navy, having been a corpsman in his youth. He wanted us to see the ships there. I have a hard time entering places with stagnant energy. It was hard to be in the ships. Lots of memories stored in the small spaces. A lot of times I just went outside.

We were up on top. My husband went to see the planes. I sat on a bench. The heat was horrible this past weekend. A woman asked if she could share the bench with me. I scooted over and we sat there in silence.

“It’s so hot here!” She said. “I’m melting away.”

“Here it’s okay. It’s an oven in there. I don’t know how these souls do it while out at sea. I admire their dedication. After seeing this I have a whole new respect for them.” I shared this as she began to fan herself with her hand.

“My son was in the Military.”

Her head lowered and I felt the grief. I felt her loss immediately in between the gaps of breath. I felt that inexplicable break that arrives when your heart has been ripped apart. Nothing else was said.

I went closer to her. Held her hand and said I was sorry. I looked into her.

There on a deck we sat in quietude. It was short lived when out little girl ran over to me. I let go of her and she thanked me. She got up and met her husband to leave. But I didn’t let go of her heart until that evening when we finally arrived home.

We have stories within stories. Some we share. Others we vault up in compartments that allow us to survive. The scars are deep and sacred. They connect us through humility and other levels of faith.

My heart goes out to all you folks who have lost someone. I can promise you that they are always with you. A part of them is left inside the cellular walls of your heart. You are never alone in your struggle. There are threads of love stitching us all together.

I’m here. I see you. I feel you. Others do as well. I love you. ~m.a.p.

Mothers

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What constitutes being a mother? There are women who have no children, yet they are amazing mothers to others. There are women who have chosen to mother themselves and set examples of nurturing out for others to follow. Some have made sacrifices and choices through painful lessons. And, YET, they get no recognition for being who they are in our society.

You are a mother when a friend is in need and you drop everything to help her, hold her hand during a crisis, and bring therapy in a bottle. You are a mother when your children need their laundry done and they can do it themselves but “Mom does it better!” You are mother to an elderly neighbor who has no one and cherishes each moment you spend with them. You are a mother to your dog, cat and sweet pets that wait anxiously for you to come home and love them. You are a mother to your mate when exhaustion fills the air and a soft caress is all you can give to show your nurturing. You are a mother to the stranger who needs a smile and you graciously hand yours (even when you are having a bad moment). You are a mother at 15, 22, 35, 46, 58, 65, 79, and 90 each time someone shares their sorrow or their joys with you. No, you don’t have to have children to be a mother. You are a mother for the world. You are a woman of strength, joy, and tenacity. You overcome so much every single day.

Happy Mother’s Day weekend to all you deliciously beautiful souls who are here with me. You totally rock! I am blessed to partake in the journey with you. I love you.

Amazing Humanity

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We met Pablo outside of a restaurant in Aguas Calientes. I was climbing up the road leaving a lung on the sidewalk. Days of hiking and climbing and I can still feel the intense stretching of my lungs.

He asked if we wanted lunch in broken English, “Señora, pizza and oxygen inside!” We laughed. We told him we would be back later.

We did. He is a charismatic young man. Matt and I sat outside so we could talk with him as he was wrangling up customers from the walkway.

Pablo is from the jungle. The real jungle of Peru. He has a scar on his face and I didn’t ask why but I bet he wrestled a puma. He came to Machu Picchu two years ago to explore. He loves it. He asked about America. He asked about life and travels. I asked about the many dogs around the city. They are friendly and they are free to roam around. I asked about the free-range children…little ones everywhere while doing remarkable well. He said nothing happens in this town. Everyone keeps an eye out.

Through observation, Machu Picchu is an ancient gathering space brought into the modern world. Life is laid back. People are in no rush for anything. There is one school in the main square and kids walk home happy as can be. I felt as if I was transported back to another time. It has a powerful esoteric power that changes you. Pablo confirmed it. We talked about the fairytale-pull it has.

Then his co-worker arrived and he practiced his English while Matt practiced his Spanish. Pablo wanted to take us dancing later and we told him we were headed back to Cusco. The two men are charming and engaging. But most of all authentic.

On our way out of town my husband said, “We should’ve taken a picture with them so you could write their story!”

So to Pablo and Juan of Machu Picchu, thank you for the present of being present with us, sharing your stories, making us laugh and teaching us compassion.

Sacred Sharing

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I met a Brazilian young woman on our tour of Machu Picchu. She had the tattoo in picture. I told her I loved it. I asked if she was finally free. She pulled me out of the line and shared her story.

She needed to say it out loud.

She has been traveling for 10 months through South America. I asked her how her spiritual quest was going? She teared up and hugged me, answering that question in an intimate level of vulnerability. She said that not many people understand what she’s doing (or the tattoo). She feels judged. I told her that judgment was people’s way of dealing with fear of what they don’t know. Her Spanish was pretty good and she said that it’s been the months of traveling. And…she continued with her story while holding my hand in joy for being understood.

There we were, two strangers climbing the sacred space unraveling in the mysteries of spirit. All she needed was to be heard. She is looking for purpose. Aren’t we all? What a gift to find such emotional stories on a magical place. Cheers to Shelley and her journey ahead!

Counting Blessings

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I was walking the beach today. This gentleman was walking towards me. I asked if I could take his picture. He’s from India. His language was a bit difficult but his lovely daughters began to translate.

“May I take a picture of you? You are so lovely!” He smiled.

“Yes, but you know that I’m old.”

“I don’t discriminate against age. You are so handsome!” He was moved as his eyes watered.

His daughters shared that they are from California. He is 92. And he told them recently he will die at 97. One daughter said, “Our father is very determined. If he says it will be at 97 he will die at 97!”

We laughed. I held his hand. We shared several pictures. I hugged him tightly.

Harbhagat Singh told me his name translates to God’s disciple. And today I needed to come across him.

People are magnificent when they are seen but don’t expect to be recognized. They are delicious in moments of surprises as they are moving along life doing their thing. It is so magical to witness all these lives connected in one small world.

He truly touched my heart with his dark eyes and smile. He was a math teacher and today he helped me count my blessings.

Happy New Everything

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If you allow for it the world will move you every day to a place of complete openness. The hardest part is allowing the heart to stay open enough to receive the gifts. Some gifts will be painful and force you to grow for the betterment of your spiritual evolution. Others will contribute grace, adventure, and love to bring you closer into the web of humanity. Give yourself the permission this new year to experience all the wow’s and aha moments while staying in the present. They will transform you forever.

Take risks, move beyond the comfort zone, laugh more, love deeper, share your life with strangers, truly forgive, don’t forget to breathe and enjoy the ride. Do the things that make you come alive. Let go of the fears. Ask questions that force your consciousness to expand. Find a spiritual practice that grounds you and gives meaning to your existence. Step out into this world with zest. Create your resolutions if you feel they will help you. Make your vision boards for guidance. Make space in your life for more joy.

I will not be creating unrealistic goals this year. I will not be putting myself with the stress through expectations. I know how it feels to spin out of control because I cannot accomplish those tasks ASAP. I am allowing each moment to dictate what needs to be done. I am being mindful with my thoughts. No more expectations! They force Ego to dictate my mood. They also lead to extreme sense of failure and disappointments. Therefore, this new year I am just gonna surf it with a child-like sense of wonder and adventure. I will dance more under the stars, play with fairies in the creeks, ride unicorns through the woods, and allow Divinity to surprise me with magic. Let’s see where that will take me! There is yumminess in just allowing for the magic to come to me.

Feel the joy? I sure do!!!

I love you. Thank you for joining me here. I am forever grateful (and often shocked) by the kind and loving support. Together we can transform the next 365 days into the best year of our lives.

~Millie