Life Happening Here

holding hands

Be soft with your spirit. Be gentle with your essence. BE authentic to your purpose and calling. Rid yourself from the negative self-talk. You become everything you say that you are or that you are not. We are born every day, every minute, every second. We are here on borrowed time. Make it lovingly serene with your heart so that you can present your soul lovingly to another. This struggle is all bullshit at the end of the day. It doesn’t matter what you did or haven’t done. This moment, wasted reading this, or contemplating what hasn’t been scratched off your To Do List, is all irrelevant. Really…this is nonsense. Me writing this is nonsense as well.

Yesterday I sat in a waiting room for just a little while holding a friend in space as her dad was having major surgery.  I wouldn’t have been any other place but right there with her in those moments.  This woman is a strong soul. Even strong souls need someone to lean on when moving through hard times.  The doctor did not provide hopeful news.  I drove home feeling an ache that surprised me.  Tears came up and out as I hit the interstate. My heart was opened so widely for her and her father that I had to pull to the side median to release the uncontrollable sorrow. I had spoken to him a few days before surgery and I knew he didn’t want to go through it.  His gut was speaking. Our time here is so fragile.  It’s daunting that these moments become everything as the superficial crap starts to fall away in the distance.   As I composed myself to keep driving I said a prayer and surrendered to the unknown.  This was not about me…but with compassion it was moving through me. I love these two souls dearly.

There are folks losing their jobs, their homes, and families.  There are others sitting alone in a hospital room watching a loved one fight for their lives. While some others are in the petty claws of political and religious arguments on social media….life is happening out there.  Life is happening in here.  Life is a series of ongoing movements and motions reminding us that we get to pick the perception and reaction. I don’t know why bad things happen.  I don’t know why anything happens.  I would like to believe it’s for the evolution of our higher self. I would like to believe it’s part of a larger design.  Who truly knows at this point?  I have to be led by faith and that onset programming of a higher body of spirit guiding me.

What I do know is that we need one another. We need a tribe. We need love.  We need to know that we aren’t alone in the path of obstacles and challenges. We need to get out of our own head space and truly feel the vibration of another who is part of the overall conscious mass.

Hold a friend’s hand in need. Hug your lover as if it was the last time. Kiss those kids tightly. Smile at a stranger. Open doors for an elderly person. Compliment a cashier. Delete the toxic folks out of your life. If they don’t raise you then they have taught you something. It’s time to move on. Use your energy wisely. My God, just get out of your head and lovingly give to another who needs to feel that the illusion of loneliness is not drowning their existence. It matters. It all matters to that one human who is struggling with life. Stop the craziness of self doubt and anxiety because there is no way you leave this life alive. So…live for yourself with honor, love, and compassion. You don’t own this blue planet alone. I am here. You are here. Let’s be here together in peace and harmony. We got this!

It starts in your backyard

end of our lives

Whenever we stop thinking in a grandiose way the world will begin to shift. Conscious choices require work outside of our reach.  I have heard so many folks stating that they wish they could make a difference in the world: feeding the hungry in Africa, saving humanity elsewhere, etc. But, nothing gets done in their backyards. There’s much to be done here. A smile at a check-out aisle, a sweet word to a stranger, a coffee for a veteran, a muffin gifted to a homeless person…. Rather than think BIG and allow EGO to create a dramatic entrance, why don’t we just start small? Send a card to a friend letting him/her know that they are a gift in your life. Text someone out of the blues with a sweet message and laughter. Leave a bag of sweetness or a candle on a neighbor’s door. You never know how much that person might need that acknowledgment on that day.  Follow that tug, pull and push from within that exudes compassion for humanity.

Life begins and ends in our circle of gratitude. Yes, it’s wonderful to think of helping humanity out there, but there’s much that can be done right here. Leave a ten dollar gift certificate on a door of a single mother who is struggling to make ends meet. We all matter! We all can make a difference when we shift our perception to here and now. Let’s remove the grandiose attitude. Sit with a stranger. Share stories, break bread, share a gentle touch, and allow the world to change you while making a difference here. We all just want to be appreciated and loved. Focus on your backyard! There’s much work to be done. We can’t all be superstars.  We matter in each others’ lives.  Start living life outside of your comfort zone and watch how the magic appears. The AHA moments will blow you away. I love you…have a great day!

Beauty in a Memory

entanglementSome moments have no room for words

because just uttering a syllable

could diminish their magic.

This is such a moment

as you lie on your stomach,

bare back saluting and hypnotizing

my fingers in circles,

dragging with tender motions to

some magnetic field of joy.

The candle flickers in the background

and your breath find its rhythm.

You are mine…right now

and I understand true beauty

as my fingertips search your skin,

folding over body heat,

exploring through scars, lines and curves

while leaving my prints to testify

that I was here.

Tears swell in my eyes

as I prop up on my hand to witness

you next to me napping

and light creating a masking silhouette

of a gentle soul.

I am seeing exquisiteness

through divinity in you.

Years from now when someone asks

for a beautiful memory I will return

to this place time and time again.

I will transport myself to the very second

when I couldn’t conjure up an adjective

to describe the scene without sounding corny.

Somehow this moment will be added to others

but for now I can cherish my touch upon your body

and the nurturing it returns with a sleepy sigh.

Body Talk

hands

Let my body speak to you

through its texture,

shape,

color,

dimples,

scar,

age,

and hear what it says

in the silence of

the imperfections.

 

Let my body dance

swaying,

trembling,

yelling in movements

the mystery of me

never witnessed before,

challenging you

to let everything go.

 

Let my body be a sponge

taking you in,

draining you out,

and drying your own spirit

by way of mysticism

so divinity can sit

with us together…

forever as one.

Through You

You are my reflection
of perfection
without any pretenses about
how I should be,
where I‘ve been,
how many mistakes I‘ve made.
I am beautiful
when I stare into your eyes
and there is nothing
that can change the delicate vision,
the magic reflecting through your soul,
that brings me to a place
of innocence.
I am better because of you.
I am a princess,
a mother,
a child,
a conqueror,
a lover —
whenever you hold my eyes,
and allow them to follow
you to a place
I‘ve never been before.
Without words,
I know that love exists
and with your touch
I know it will never die.
In you
I see what no one else can:
pure energy for life;
decency for another;
a validation for my existence;
humanness and compassion;
the thread of all there is in the universe.
In you
I am all —
simple and complicated;
moody and irrational;
loving and not;
laughter and silliness;
BUT
you still adore me
in spite of it all
because in you
I am a spontaneous adventure
full of serendipitous moments.

Touch

touch

Two mornings ago, at 4AM, I woke to feed my grand-baby.  In the process I had to run to the bathroom and vomit.  This was the beginning of a long day hurled over a toilet, chills, body aches and trying to make sense of how and where I got sick.  With every release I felt parts of me shutting down.  I would go from the bathroom to the bed and back. I would go to check on the baby who was well taken care by my fiancé.  I needed to touch someone.  I needed to feel the security of life around me.  My state of awareness was fading along with my energy.  Touch via words, physical caress, or a glance was my lifeline.

It is in moments of illness, sadness, turmoil and desperation that human touch is the best cure.  Sometimes it seems like the only healing agent. A stroke on the forehead always seemed to soothe my children when they were sick.  A gentle caress with words of assurance always seems to aid a friend in need.  A rub on the neck or shoulders of a partner seems to remove the stressors of a day.  Touch!  It is that one thing that allows our humanity to cure itself from hatred and prejudice when we least expect it from a stranger.  The touch of hands, a smile, kindness and laughter erase the rough edges from anyone who is hurting quicker than any pill.  It might not last long but it is a start in allowing the mind, body and spirit to reconnect and find equilibrium.

When we are sick we think it is never going to be over.  The pain that progresses in the body creates a barrier of time and space.  We don’t know how we ever felt at our best.  Even a twenty-four hour stomach virus can spark the desire for comfort from another.  The most un-affectionate person can fear being alone.  It isn’t about feeling needy or clingy.  It is about knowing that someone out there has our back.  We are cared in a way that brings us back to the womb.  It reunites childhood emotions of safety, belonging, security and acceptance. The web of human and spirit unite bringing and taking us back to basics. All the medicine in the world can’t fix the necessity to be sustained and held by another.  Touch is vital to our existence.  And, it is even more prominent when we are sick.

I woke better the next day.  My mate and daughter caught it for themselves.  The things I can offer now are touches of love, kisses on their foreheads, gentle nudges, and the assurance that they aren’t alone.  I got their backs.  I can’t take away their symptoms but I can be there for whatever they need.  John Keats said that “touch has a memory.” I believe each caress has an imprinting long-lasting effect that transports spirit when it is done from love.   There’s a connection between relief, reward, reassurance, and release within the walls of our beings.   Our hands carry lifetimes of healing memories.  Within a fingertip we can create the awareness of universal love.

Everyday our lives are touched by desire, creativity, hope, dreams, spirituality, faith, love, and a million other things.  If we are fortunate enough to allow another to enter into our vulnerability we can be touched by God.  It is there that the source of our existence lights the path to every obstacle, malady, disorder and affliction.


“We have lost the art of public tenderness, these small gestures of wiping and washing; we have forgotten how abjectly the body welcomes a formal touch.” ~Anne Enright

Beauty

from phone 053Some moments have no room for words

because just uttering a syllable

could diminish their magic.

This is such a moment

as you lie on your stomach,

bare back saluting and hypnotizing

my fingers in circles,

dragging with tender motions to

some magnetic field of joy.

The candle flickers in the background

and your breath find its rhythm.

You are mine…right now

and I understand true beauty

as my fingertips search your skin,

folding over body heat,

exploring through scars, lines and curves

while leaving my prints to testify

that I was here.

Tears swell in my eyes

as I prop up on my hand to witness

you next to me napping

and light creating a masking silhouette

of a gentle soul.

I am seeing exquisiteness

through divinity in you.

Years from now when someone asks

for a beautiful memory I will return

to this place time and time again.

I will transport myself to the very second

when I couldn’t conjure up an adjective

to describe the scene without sounding corny.

Somehow this moment will be added to others

but for now I can cherish my touch upon your body

and the nurturing it returns with a sleepy sigh.

Doodles

I trace your skin
Drawing circles,
Spiraling signatures
Up and down
As you enter into
The subliminal cosmos
Of relaxation.

A finger swirling in hair,
A light pull with nails,
Bringing the sensations
To your core
And eventually a slight smile
Builds on your lips.

I doodle further
Searching for the gifts
An artist creates
Witnessing invisible lines
Connecting
You,
Me,
And the universe of possibilities.

Playground

Your hands guide me
Into the world
Between dark and light
Where I stand alone
Pressed against another
Time falling into yearning,
Desires, gaps of intimate
Dreams created in novels
And you witness
My come and go,
Rise and fall….

Your eyes search
For a confirmation
That a line isn’t crossed
Where we won’t meet
With imbalance,
Rejection, judgment
And pain.
I am gone while you
Pull and push your way
Through this fantasy world.
I don’t think I will ever
Be the same
Because you brought
Play into my ground.