Message in Meditation

Trust is an emotional mechanism that was placed in our DNA when we began creation. The collective and society, through fear and other low vibrational frequencies, have caused it to downgrade. We question it. We don’t use it as we should. There is a default programming in its place. So we no longer just trust. We struggle with it. We have been shown over and over that it isn’t a means to survive. We don’t trust or allow for intuition to guide us.

When we return to our origins, through love, Trust will be the first input to be upgraded again. It is still in our DNA. It’s been muted. It’s been centuries of misuse and abuse. It is about to return as our guidance. Soon! We are being awakened slowly. It was designed to be right now in this time.

Humanity needed to experience all that it has endured. We are a stubborn race. We have more followers than leaders. And the leaders have guided through manipulation of fear and repression. They know how to play the part. The followers have also played their role. The imbalance is soon to tip the scales.

Trust will return with ascension. It will be intuitively available to guide us again. It is our internal GPS. Those who are ready will begin to feel it in their solar plexus and use it to create a new world. You are experienced the massive amount of energy at this time. Many will not question what the masses are leading. And in this trust we will once again become whole as one. There will be millions not ready to awake. It’s not your job to provide the push for them. Those are their lessons and contracts before coming into this incarnation. Your only job is to love and show love through your own journey. People don’t learn through words. They evolve through experiences. They see and imitate what feels good.

Don’t judge. Don’t manipulate. Don’t enforce your beliefs. Don’t attack. Don’t hate. Don’t do anything to force another to think as you do.

Love…over and over… is the key to open all the unlocked passages in humanity. Forgiveness heals through love. Trust opens because of love. We change and expand because of love. When in doubt just love. Accept it as the answer to all there is and all there ever was.

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Our Spiritual Truth

The source of divine guidance is ever present waiting patiently for us to remember of our power within. Once we open up to it, accepting there is no outer power separate from the self, it all starts to materialize.

We hold our world. We get to mold our lives. We cannot blame anyone else for fully participating in our creation.

Spiritual truth is acceptance of our decisions. It is knowing and believing that we are creators.

I’m seeing the miracles in that place full of clarity and knowing. It is the multiverse energy of truth. It’s the Christ Consciousness. It’s the Buddha mind. It is all that we’ve been taught to be without the dogma. It is all in us. It’s all that we were created to be.

Open up to it. Allow for it. Remember your power comes from within. You are not without anything. You are the greatest alchemist.

You want to know your superpower?

It’s love. It’s all about compassion, acceptance and love.

We use terminology that seems puzzling, like matrix or ascension when we talk about spiritual awakening. It’s not that difficult. There is part physics but the rest is who we are. The words are designed to trigger a memory, an emotion, that opens us up. It allows consciousness to expand and we vibrate into truth. The words we use also give power to what we create. Every syllable is magnetic. It attracts everything we want and need.

We are designed to grow and evolve into these human bodies. We are having a human experience while returning to our source of divine spirit. We come in through consciousness of pure love and leave via the same manner to become the heart of the collective. To be the All of Truth. To be the source of divinity and transpire into deeper love.

I love you.

Letting Love Live

This morning I had a memory of the first time I was stung with uncensored and unconditional love. I’m sure I had hundreds, or perhaps thousands of moments, but that evening seemed to stand out loudly.

My husband and I had been dating for a few months. I spent the night at his place. We had made love and only a candle lit the room. He had fallen sleep on his stomach. I turned over and saw him. The light from the candle enhanced his back muscles. I gasped. He was beautiful. I looked at his bare back in pure delight. Tears formed and I allowed for their release. He was sound asleep. I became very aware that he was mine, for however long that would be, and he was lovely. Not just because of his body but his sense of humor. I was falling in love. I was falling into a known territory that felt remarkably unfamiliar to all others.

I traced my fingers on his back softly following the shadows. He woke and turned over to his side while I kept rubbing him with my nails. At some point I fell into a slumber wrapped by his arms. The next morning as I drove the hour and twenty minutes home, I kept thinking of that moment that allowed me to fall so profoundly that every cell in my body felt the expansion of love. I literally felt a huge break in my chest.

Then I started to freak out. I felt I was losing myself. How could I? I’ve done this dance many times before. I had given all of me for years and not been reciprocated but what amazing lessons I had learned. I regret not a one!

As I watched the stretch of mountains ahead my heart felt a tingle and a pull. I was safe to fall. I was safe to rise towards the delight of being me…my authentic self without censoring from a man. The sun was rising over the landscape and I knew I had permission from the heavens to just feel the love that was to grow. I remember this many years later. I remembered it this morning as I watched him sleep in his stomach bundled under warm blankets.

Driving over the mountains that morning I recalled twenty years before when I was dating a lovely man. After we made love I fell asleep in his arms. Sometime after that I woke to him watching me sleep and the blinds wide open. He said, “The moon looks beautiful on your back. It makes your freckles look like stars!” He meant every syllable of that sentiment.

I buried my head on the pillow in embarrassment. I had a hard time taking in any kind of compliment.

I had never been seen…Or so I felt. He saw me. And when he died a year later a part of me died with him. Now noticing my new lover and his divine essence naked in front of me I felt all the love in the world that had been given, shared and exchanged. I felt it intensified and released in my soul. It wasn’t just a physical or emotional connection. It was a spiritual one.

At midlife I was finally me without apologizing.

And I allowed for all that was to come. He was mine then. He continues to be mine now. It has taken a tremendous amount of work and dance to stay in that love but it’s been so worth it. Because that’s what marriage entails. We are on the other side of that mountain of uncertainty and doubts. We are led by stars and candlelight through the darkest of obstacles.

We are in it because of the raw vulnerability from one another. We show up not always in perfect lighting. It’s in the unmade beds, crazy sleepless nights with kids, messy days, hard obstacles, little moments and unconditional love without judgment. It’s real life naked and fully clothed behind closed doors. I’m blessed.

Divine in You

The day will come when you won’t be looking for faith outside of you. When you stop looking for God in temples and religion. You will notice the Divine staring back from the reflection in the mirror. You will see it smiling at you in a homeless person or a loved one taking his last breath. You will find Source in your children as they laugh out loud. You will feel spirit in the kiss from your mate. You will finally recognize our connections and how important it is to be kind and compassionate to everyone. Even when they don’t accept it. You will find the silence and ability to walk away. This will be when you have reach the loving understanding of your purpose through unconditional love. I see you. I feel you. I know the God in you. And in me. I love you.

Love Goes and Returns

I met this young woman today at French Broad Chocolate Lounge in Asheville. She began to share her story in between four of us sharing a lavender creme brûlée, a chocolate cake, ice cream and brownies. It was a diabetic dream. But what was better was her sharing of how her life has changed…or made a giant circle.

She has reconnected with her high school boyfriend who was much older. Now, after getting divorced and having two kids, she’s available. He’s never had another serious relationship. He’s never been married.

“How does something like this happen? How was he waiting? Did he secretly hope your marriage failed?” I asked fascinated while laughing.

“Nope, he just didn’t fall in love ever again. He was the love of my life. I have been the love of his. It was bad timing when I was in college…!” She went into intimate intricate yummy in’s and out’s of condensing ten years.

“And here you are! He just declared his love. He’s picking up right where his heart left off.” I patted my heart in complete delight for the utter harlequin romance of it all.

We continued to feed our souls, but the true sweetness was in Sara’s story. It was the love that was declared and shared. It was the delicate reminders of how time doesn’t really exist and you can return to the beginning over and over.

It takes pure vulnerability to stay open to the magic of what may be without forcing things. It requires courage to follow the heart and quiet the mind. This is love at its depth of being.

Life has a way of bringing in the most amazing events when you discard the expectation. Love goes and returns when it’s meant to appear. And this afternoon her energy expressed it all beyond words. It was the most magnificent delicatessen in that chocolate factory.

~m.a.p.

Connections

“The first time

you looked at me

I saw myself

looking through

another time

returning back

to you again.”

I witnessed a man and a woman in a book store looking at one another through bookshelves. She smiled, put her head down pretending to look at the titles, and tucked her hair behind her ear. He browsed through the books still keeping an eye on her and smiling. They did this for a few minutes. And then for one moment they stared into each other. That one moment was infinite. Their stories unfolded right there with a bookshelf holding this timeline apart. They went their ways. I sat there replaying their intimacy.

If we allow others to come into this realm…every one who tries to…what would our world look like? I mean, the loves…the ones that we push away because of timing and responsibility. I encounter many of these stories without a word being exchanged. I tend to them, noting the endless possibilities of their silence. Their connection is beyond this world. And I can see it’s all about timing.

We are all connected. Whenever we choose to engage in this acceptance we may find that magic is truly fate in disguise. ~m.a.p.

Visitation

I woke at 3 or so this morning. I went outside and sat on my wet deck, as it rained throughout the night. I sat there listening to the silence of morning until a little bird landed near me. I found it odd that a bird was up that early. She had one leg. She hopped closer and stood there. I wasn’t alone in my thoughts. I had a visitor and one with a tremendous handicapped that allowed me to come out of my own funk. She had adapted to waking early in order to eat since she was slower. I moved a bit to get comfortable and it startled her…she flew away. I whispered for her to return. Eventually she did and hopped back towards me. She began to nibble at the blueberries that had fallen on the ground. So…for some sweet while it was me and the bird and the universe waking to another day. It was my heart being flung open with her little visitation. It was my thoughts taking a backseat from doubt, sadness, and the large scope of humanness. It was a lot, and nothingness, in a half hour (or whatever time it was). I wanted to continue sitting in the wetness, in my quiet safety net, in her presence as she hopped from bush to bush and back. I needed to go inside to meditate in comfort. 

I am given beautiful lessons through simple awareness. We all have these small windows of love and spirituality. Most people don’t stop long enough to notice but they are there. We are provided with the loveliest of visitors to show up in our world. Stay open. Continue to invite the extraordinary to gift you with messages. 

As I was getting my little girl in the car, hours later, the bird landed on the bush next to the car. I smiled, thanked her, blew a kiss…and she flew away.  Until next time, birdie…until next time!