Someone told me a story today about a professor she had many decades ago in college. The professor was going blind and my friend became her assistant to check papers and run errands for her in the university. We had been discussing what we knew for sure. She said her professor would always say that the only thing every morning she knew to be true (that she could count on daily) was that 2+2=4.
I looked at my friend and she said that she needs certainty in her life. Now in her 60’s she wakes every day with one or two things she can count on, including that 2+2=4.
I went silent. I allowed her to give me a long explanation of why she needed to know things for certain…because there were too many unknowns already in our lives. She needed to have something to control as she entered each day.
She asked me if I needed something of certainty daily. I told her I already had it. I know when I wake daily I am given a gift…one more day. One more blank canvas to serve the world. I didn’t need to add or subtract. I didn’t need to hold on to something for sure…. I like the surprises that appear in the journey. It’s more fun that way.
She smiled. She recognizes that I am airy-fairy. She is of logical sound mind. I am not. I walk on serendipity and synchronicities daily. I know that I know nothing. I don’t need assurance because the moment I wake I have been provided with magic.
What do you need to know for sure on a daily basis? Is there something that you have to know? Do you require lists and control elements to move through your day? Do you need reassurance daily from loved ones?
And, what if you didn’t have to take inventory of what you know? What could you do with all that time you surrender to the unknown and the mysticism of your life? Please share.
People will ask a lot from you. They will ask for help, expecting answers, needing favors, connecting with your light, sometimes sucking the life force from your truth. You can help another. Honor their feelings, but by no means take on their pain, their anger, selfish disorders, mental illnesses, needs and wants. You are only responsible for you!!!
We are here to learn and serve without expectations. The moment someone interferes in your realm of calmness your spirit begins to get uptight. Feel that emotion and go with your gut. If it doesn’t feel like love then you are being guided to not interfere. And this IS the tricky part for most of us. We are talk to help and fix our fellow man.
You have a choice. You ALWAYS have a choice in helping another. “No!” is a complete sentence…it’s how you say it….always say thank you after those words. But, remember the difference between helping and enabling. That thin line is not suppose to be used for jumping rope.
I love you. Honor YOU. Be gentle with you. And, most of all LOVE YOURSELF enough to put you in the number one spot of your life.
I am learning, daily, that in order for me to live and love in my authentic truth I must honor MY feelings first and foremost. The moment I make room for joy, the universe conspires with my desires to bring it forth. It’s amazing.
So, my darling, You got this! Have a blessed day. ~m.a.p.
It is our deepest longing to find answers to why we exist. What is the meaning of it all? Why are we here? And what is the reason to keep searching?
We have questions and we search for answers. Over and over. The answers are rarely found. The more awaken you are the deeper the desire for those answers. They are permitted to come in and accepted as they align with our truth. This is why my answers might not resonate with yours. Questions have little answers through quests. They come through in moments of stillness and silence. Whether they are spiritual questions or not. Our only job is to be present (fully available) for the answers to arrive. Often times we don’t ask the right questions because when the answers arrive they don’t match our expectations. Ask and it is given so be careful what you ask. You might not want it.
Whatever you are wanting make clear declarations. Don’t settle. The universe has a sense of humor. It will utilize our wishy washy emotional state to show us what we might fear or not want. Stay in your truth.
The question you need to ask yourself when you aren’t receiving answers is: what am I resisting? Lately, this has been happening to me. I’m in a total funk of yuckiness to be honest. I’m surfing through. I don’t go back and I won’t go forward. All I have is this moment and at times it is truly hard to handle. But the questions are always there because I know better. I am allowing for the mysteries to unfold. It will come together…
I know consciousness does not think. Consciousness just is. It exists through the mind and body in spite of thoughts. It is the universal connector of all that lives. It is the all that creates us.
These aren’t easy times but they are full of manifesting desires quickly. So make sure you ask for what you really want without confusion. And keep asking the hard questions. Keep searching for purpose. Ride the waves and allow for each breath to be your guide. Your higher self knows it all. It is waiting for you to sit back, shut up and listen!
That’s faith and belief.
Faith is not an ability to foresee the outcome of a situation. It isn’t the holding on and believing the far circumstances of every tomorrow. Faith is the anchor that holds certainty even when it doesn’t look good, even when you have no clue what will happen. It is taking every single step blindly while knowing that the Universe has your best interest.
You aren’t in control so let go and let God! The moment you start to manipulate an outcome, things begin to fall apart. You create scenarios and obstacles that have no business being there.
Live in the magic of transformation. Love the journey of what is and what isn’t. Laugh and be inJOY! That’s where you will find God.
I stared outside the window
witnessing sky art
created by the heavens.
I reach inside,
searching for the warmth
of my soul
sending a “thank you”
to the Universe
for the splendid,
gift of living
In the silence,
through the walls
of love and serenity,
I find Divinity
of a chilling winter morning,
“You are greatly welcome…!”
Live life centered
around your being,
the essence radiating light.
Do not spin your energy
in someone else’s nucleus.
You are only responsible for you
and the matter created
Those who gravitate to your spirit
can borrow the light
but not remove it to make it theirs.
You are an individual with purpose;
this life plan is yours alone.
Many can travel along your path
but only you know where
you are headed.
Be the brightest lighthouse
guiding your existence…
be the “I AM” of your universe.
“Wisdom tells me I am nothing. Love tells me I am everything. And between the two my life flows.” – Nisargadatta Maharaj
I have been self-absorbed lately, so much to the point of trying to find purpose on a life I’ve created from love, faith and the awareness of lessons. Ever since I was a child I have always known what I wanted from life. I’ve never been without goals. Except now I am looking for “home” through the internal maze of consciousness. I am not depressed. I have bouts of sadness at times because of loss, changes, and those who have come and gone, leaving me to question my humanity. I am left to question my character and how I have been part of others and their drama. But, I am aware that we all live through this because it sums the total of our lives. Without reflection and deep introspect we are nothing.
I was driving back from town early this morning and out of the blue, tears began to flow. I was overcome with joy, giddiness and something else. I know there is no such thing as “out of the blue” because inside of each one of us we know the answer to every moment, feeling, and choice. Our psyche will form false illusions through ego, but we all have the answers. I pulled to the side of the road shaking off “the whatever issue” that was strangulating me. Even though it felt good it also felt sad. It is that “whatever” attitude that brought me into releasing the tears. I was admiring the scenery coming up the mountain as the sun was casting minimal light through the fog making the bright colored leaves even more magnificent. I began to say the word, “home,” out loud.
I am home. At this moment I look back at a some very difficult years. I’ve had to re-establish my sense of identity and my purpose as things have evolved. Every change and challenge has pushed me to question my sanity, beliefs, and connections. I’ve made plans and now have had to deviate from many of them. However, the new journey has been delicious because it has shown me other parts of myself. But, at times thoughts transpire and I recognize them as small hiccups that push the internal needs to frustration.
The Divine has reshaped the map to the future with some humorous points. At times I see the irony and humor in the childish idea that I have control of my life. The joke is on me! I realize what home is now. I see it through the faces of loved ones, the places I’ve lived and the memories collected throughout my days. Home is deeper than a place of residence. It is something in me that remembers and settles with ease. This could be through anything. Home is the essence of who I am.
Something happened when I had the near-death experience almost three years ago. Something significant came back with me deleting all sense of fear. Normal problems now seem ridiculously dramatic circumstances trying to push my higher evolution to learn quicker. In this state of awkwardness I let things fall too easily at times, while at other times they grab a hold of me and suck the air out leaving a vast emptiness with answers to no questions. I don’t understand the struggle here on earth. I don’t comprehend the suffering. Where I went in those moments of leaving my physical body I was at peace. I was engulfed by a light of love. Nothing compares to that. And this morning as I witnessing the reds, oranges and yellows on the mountains, I recognized that sense of awesomeness that must be experienced as I let go. I keep surrendering with constant clarity that whatever is ahead is rigged in my favor.
I want to live fully. I want to live to the highest desire of my authentic soul. I want to live with passion even when I have no clue to what is ahead. I want to watch sunrises and sunsets as often as I can. I want to see my children grow old, experiencing the magnificence of life. I want my friends around me through the tough and easy times. I want to drink wine, slack off, chase fairies at night, have fun, and still be responsible to know better. I want to keep waking up every morning to the smell of this body aging, growing, and expanding. I want my mate to hold me, touch me gently, wipe my cares and tell me that we will be together until we are not. I want to be guided my synchronicity and serendipity. I want to live a life that is meaningful to that light I witnessed as snow was falling outside of the hospital. I want to continue to hear autumn leaves wrestling while mimicking the sound of rain. I want to experience the changing of four seasons for sixty-something more years. I want to look in the mirror and see the best of me that no other person will ever see. I want to meet strangers and give them a smile to take with them. I want to continue to want things that money can’t buy. I want to stop the urgency of hurt in others and let them know that they are not alone.
Life is truly a bitch at times, but we get this incredible opportunity to make it whatever we want. This is our home. This is my home. Mass consciousness carries energy and it’s time to alter the negative vibes and make them positive ones.
I have become little in my “knowing” while constantly being bombarded by my guides and the remnants of passing souls on a day-to-day basis. It’s not easy to live among the living and still have a foot firmly planted through the veils of reality. I returned from that other dimension with a keen awareness of the miracle of consciousness. There is no description that can do justice to the world outside of this physical one.
Even all these years later I try to make sense of my need to go home when I see beauty unfolding as I did this morning. I continue to struggle with fitting in my body while feeling comfortable in my skin and those around me. I have this achy feeling of not belonging in this reality where the complaints outweigh the contentment in humanity. I haven’t a clue of what I want, as I used to, for so long in my life. There is no grounding until we wake up as spiritual beings. I feel that clearly nudging at me through meditation. There are people truly battling the claws of death through illnesses and they are holding on to life with passion (sometimes through fear). I am blessed to have a chance to stay here and breathe one more day.
We, in this human form, waste so much precious time expecting others to make us happy, tell us what we need and should do, and give us a reason to wake every morning. We live with constant stress of perfection that doesn’t exist. We want to know without having to walk the path. There’s no way! It’s better to live with the wisdom of experience, the open heart of love and the in-between world of accepting that we are spiritual beings having a human experience. It’s okay. It is in that world that, I guess, I find home time and time again. The sadness comes and goes. Joy and grace visit just as often. I will continue to move through this world holding tightly to what I do know is true for me.
As I type this I am witnessing the essence of earth dancing outside. This is the quietude of presence that assures me that what’s to come is beyond anything I could imagine. It’s in that anticipation that the willingness to continue spoils me and brings me joy. Won’t you meet me there? Grab a hold of your truth and let it evolve into the best you there will ever be. Your thoughts are ripples in the waves of mass consciousness. Together we will make this place home!
For whatever reason we place everything before our faith and spiritual practice: career, children, spouses, house work, drama, and all the busyness that comes with our humanness. Spirituality seems to come as a last alternative, full of shameful guilt for not doing more, we touch it with half of our soul’s yearning. Meditation and prayer come in moments of desperation. It becomes an assignment of negotiation with God. The truth is we are spiritual beings having a human experience.
Spirituality is not perfect. It isn’t stuck in a box of rituals for each person to follow. Spirituality is sloppy and chaotic at times. Our spirits desire the awakening experience. The Divine is in us waiting to be touched and held. My mornings require ritual: lighting candles, incense, saying my prayers to enter the world, and sitting in silence with a cup of coffee or tea. I need these moments of deep awareness as I open my curtains and allow the outside to join my space. I need to show my spirit gratitude for another breath. This is not a perfect ritual of contemplation but it is mine to uncover and welcome Divinity into my day. It is mine to join with the joy and acceptance of every single day.
Spiritualism accepts the imperfections, the messy lives, the brokenness, the unsaid truths, and everything under the spectrum that we think is not acceptable in organized religion. Why do we hide behind the façade of impeccable accomplishments? It seems that faith is based on what we can see and control rather than the acceptance of the unknown. We practice spiritual perception with fear of what we don’t know and can happen. What would happen if we allow synchronicity to dictate our days? If we moved with serendipity rather than against it? If we no longer feared the future? What would happen to us then if we allowed something greater than ourselves to move through us as the Commander in Chief of our lives?
At the end of your life you will not regret the lack of another degree, not having bought the little red sports car, not getting that expensive house, not having enough money in the bank. You will regret not having spent more time in nature, holding a friend’s hand in need, missing your child’s recital, not taking walks with your beloved, not speaking your truth, and so many other things that might seem irrelevant at this moment. You might feel ashamed for the time not spent with Divinity, kisses from your children, hugs from your parents, and sweet words from a lover. You will wonder why you didn’t sit and relaxed more, breathed the earth deeper, and allowed each moment to count just as it is meant to touch you. The things most important in life have nothing to do with money, winning, status or work. They have to do with love, sharing and other moments invaluable to your spirit. The first and only person you need to answer to is yourself. The second is your faith. Give each moment the degree of importance it needs to be cherished and enjoyed. Be present in your conversations, visits, and life. Don’t waste time worrying about the things that stress you, or the to-do list. Don’t be overwhelmed with anxiety for what could not happen and participate in the moment you have available right now. This is part of sloppy spirituality: the deep awareness of each breath, touch, and leaving everything behind. It is about reprogramming your senses, needs, and releasing the control of what we have been conditioned to be religious beliefs.
I rather live a messy spiritual life than one of conformed social expectations while living inside of a make believe fantasy that never witnesses the miracle of God. I rather behold the eyes of someone speaking with me and truly seeing their soul unfold. That’s the most beautiful form of spiritual wisdom. I can’t think of anything more whole to experience the oneness of our existence.