Toxic Energy

In the desert of Africa there lives a wasp that preys on a specific spider. It stings the spider, paralyzing it, and then places her eggs inside of her to incubate. As the eggs grow the spider dies and it becomes a moist haven for the wasp babies to grow. Now, imagine if you will, all those people in your lives who sting you and paralyze you with toxic energy. They are incubating negativity, fear, anger, and an array of emotions that DO NOT and SHOULD NOT belong in your body. However, we do let them, don’t we?

As we watched this segment yesterday the spider did get away from the wasp, rolling down the desert sands and I cheered on internally, “Goooo little one, woohoo, you made it!” This is how I feel when someone comes at me with some toxic bs trying to penetrate their venom in me. I am done incubating other folks’ seeds of insecurity. I am done feeding the fears and anxiety.

When will you stop and move into freedom? You do not have to entertain every thought, criticism, judgment, and egotistical behavior. You do not own anything that is not yours. You are only responsible for your emotions. Sometimes these folks are masked as sweet and innocent. Sometimes just viciously mean. It’s up to you to roll out of their sight. You are magnificent intuitive beings.

Live inJOY! Send those wasps running else where. You own your body, mind, and spirit. No one else can do this for you! ~m.a.p.

Resistance

Resistance sucks!

We think that by avoiding the pull and push that we are saving ourselves from pain, but it’s the other way around. The more we resist the worse anything becomes. We have been taught to resist emotional breakdowns. We have been programmed to hold tightly to our traumas and not let them go so freely with others. We piggy back those suckers for life. Most of us resist compliments and endearing words of admiration. We don’t believe we deserve them. We continue to resist in every part of our lives because letting go and surrendering are signs of weakness. But this is erroneous. Vulnerability is beautiful and to let go is pure divine freedom.


Resistance is the fight between the adjustment and flexibility of allowing things to come and go. I need to nurture my body with gentleness. I need to remind myself to take time for silence on a daily basis. I require nature to ground me and sustain me so I can keep going while releasing the toxicity of things around me.
STOP! Stop carrying shit that’s holding you down.

Let it go. Dump it. Fling it. Throw it away. Whatever it takes but release all the crap that has kept you imprisoned in your mind, body and spirit. ~ m.a.p.

Soul Connections

This morning I went to visit some clients at several facilities. Most are elderly folks in those places. After seeing a sweet client, a woman in a wheelchair in the hall grabbed my hand and asked if I would visit with her. She mumbled the words a bit incoherently. She said she never gets anyone to visit. She was a bit disoriented and asked if I would sit with her. I believe her name was Janet but she kind of stumbled through it under her breath. So I rolled her down to the nearest place to sit with her. We really just sat there. She didn’t say much but I took her hand and held it in mine. Her eyes looked up at me with tears. I felt the desire to cry with her but held it tightly in my chest. I rubbed her fragile hands against mine. She smiled, I smiled. She just wanted to be acknowledged. She didn’t need anything else but to feel wanted for a few minutes. Stories formulated in that instance as I envisioned her forty years younger, dancing and caring for others.

This is life at the frail moments of vulnerability. I tried to get going but she pulled me back down so I sat for a bit longer. I shared about the sun and how lovely the day was. I asked if she wanted to sit by the window. She nodded no. I told her it was a delightful surprise to meet her. She sobbed a little more. I got up from my chair and got on my knees to see her face. She is lovely. She is precious. I told her this while pulling her chin gently up so her eyes could meet mine. I needed her to feel the awareness of one soul to another meeting for the first time.

Even with dementia souls recognize one another. They are more keen to it because they don’t have all the other static thoughts. I don’t know her history. I don’t know who she is. That really doesn’t matter. What truly is of great importance is to cherish a moment with another who will see you, feel you, and know that you are being loved.

Today…tomorrow…whenever you can, give your soul a gift of truly sitting with a stranger and listen to a story or just hold their hand. I came out of there walking to the car, seeing the mountains in the distance and sobbed. I sobbed for her, for my client who is deteriorating, for all those who sit in wheelchairs or lie alone in a bed waiting for death to arrive. And, then just like that two dragonflies flew around me. Life and its magic. It’s truly a gift and privilege to be here for as long as I need to be. And I promise myself that if I can serve one person every day with kind words or a smile I will do it until I am no longer able to.

Love is the Fountain of Youth

How and when did this age sneak upon me? I wake almost everyday (minus the sound effects coming from the body hitting the floor) feeling like I’m in my thirties. When I think about this age (not the one that lives in my head full of spunk and sassiness) I can’t seem to blend it with the reality. It’s not. And I will define myself as young for the rest of my life. See, I am determined to be the happiest woman arriving into the 100’s. I plan on laughing and playing practical jokes on all those moody folks around me. I am determined to live with purpose and remember this is one hell of a f*€king ride that is a privilege denied to so many. No one can stop the aging process but I be damn if I don’t stop getting old. That’s my choice. Embrace your age and your experiences. Laugh and play and cry and spread love as often as possible. Love. Love is the fountain of youth.

Epiphany


I have an epiphany every single time I enter a facility to visit an elderly person. I hear stories that no one cares to hear. I hear regrets within their lack of clarity. I hear the silence in between words. I see the distance in what was and what is now in their lives. I make up stories in my head, adding to the ones they can share in a few words through whispers. I hear the struggle waiting for death to arrive and the fear that comes with it as well. There is gratitude in walking into a place and then returning to my life. How can I complain when I have health, love and joy? Who am I to even shed a tear over the pettiness of a hard day? Do yourself a favor, adjust your perspective and gratitude by visiting a homeless shelter, taking flowers to an assistant living facility, or visiting hospice. Sit with a stranger and learn something new. Nothing like a true reality check to make you aware. Your life is richer because of those folks who teach you the meaning of what you are and have. Be love. Be light. Be everything but unsatisfied. We are here on borrowed time, making our way through this journey. We aren’t alone. We are holding each other up…even strangers that pass for two minutes. We receive everything we give…so make it count, darlings. Make it count for all those who truly need your love and light.